Today's show 03/10/11

Monday mornings are always a problem, aren't they? The weekend (with some exceptionally fine weather here on Saturday, at least) has come and gone and left your editorial team fumbling around trying to find some "news" stories to cover today. I see from your web page (updated nice and early again today - thank you) that the barrel has been well and truly scraped and they have found four items for discussion, and none of which are of relevance or interest to me as I shall explain later.

If you needed help all you had to do was ask and I could have helped with a couple, at least.

My first choice would have been this one from Jeremy's favourite newspaper, the Daily Mail (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2044206/BBC-presenters-accused-advertising-door-Berghaus-winterwear.html#ixzz1ZVf5HGGH):
The Berghaus Broadcasting Corporation: Presenters accused of 'advertising by the back door' as BBC gets massive discounts on designer winterwear

Allow me to quote:
The BBC has been accused of allowing its presenters to advertise Berghaus clothing by ‘the back door’ – after negotiating a deal to buy jackets at a 45 per cent discount.
BBC editorial guidelines state that staff should adhere to a set of strict rules banning them from the on-screen promotion of products or brands.

So, how does that work then? I think we should be told and I would consider this a worthy topic for discussion.

The second item I would have chosen concerns Jeremy's old friend George "We're all going to die - no, really, we really are all going to die" Monbiot. You know him, he is the famous pedlar of the Anthropogenic Global Warming myth and seems to make a good living from doing so as he has chosen to publish details of his income here: http://www.monbiot.com/registry-of-interests/. You will probably gather that I am no fan of the man but I do admire his openness and wonder whether others in public life might like to do the same kind of thing. George "I'd like the cream" Galloway would be of most interest to me!

You seem to have missed that the Conservative Party Conference is taking place in Manchester this week too. Interesting, don't you think, that last week Jeremy covered this in some detail (Monday : Economy, Tuesday : Rory "I'm so poor - has anybody seen my iPad?" Weal, Wednesday : Ed Miliband's "predator or producer" speech) but yet there is nothing about the Tories today. You may have heard that George Osbourne has announced this morning that Council Tax is to be frozen for another 12 months (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-15145083), yet your programme chooses to make no mention of it. So, why is that? Bias, bias, bias, BIAS! That's why. Jeremy will be proud of you.

 

In connection with this I had to laugh (because it is oh, so true) at a piece posted on Guido Fawkes's blog (http://order-order.com/2011/10/03/overheard-in-the-midland-hotel-bar-ii/), which I will quote in full as it might play on somebody's guilt there - maybe:
Overheard in the Midland Hotel Bar II

A newbie MP talking to a young blonde lady. The MP says “it was nice to meet you, but I’ve got to go and show my face at the British Venture Capital Association reception”. The young lady immediately says “wow, that sounds like a very right-wing group.”  The MP looks bemused, replying “I wouldn’t say that. It’s business, it’s not left-wing or right-wing. So what do you do?” The lady suddenly looks embarrassed: “I work for the BBC.” “Oh? Doing what exactly?” “I’m public affairs – it’s my job to persuade all of you lot that we’re not a bunch of raving left wingers.” “You’re not doing a very good job so far…” came the reply.

Today's issue that affects me: What were Radio 2 management thinking when they decided to use Jon Holmes and Miranda Hart on the breakfast show this week?

Interesting too that at 08:24 this morning they gave a run-down of what is to come on Radio 2 today, which - according to them - consisted of Ken Bruce and Steve Wright, with no mention of your programme. Perhaps they, like me, are pretending that it doesn't exist.

Moving on then to today's Tory-free tosh, which doesn't look like it will take long to deal with:

1) KNOX MURDER TRIAL - Amanda Knox pleads for her innocence in court today. The case continues to be sensational but are we in danger of forgetting that an English girl called Meredith Kercher was murdered? : I hadn't forgotten that, but thanks for reminding me. On that basis, do I need to listen? Next...

2) CARERS - A disabled woman suspicious that her carers were stealing from her installs CCTV and catches them red-handed. Can your carer be trusted? : What carer is that then? Next...

3) COLD & FLU REMEDIES - We’re joined by Radio 2 Doctor Sarah Jarvis. Following an inquest last week, are you in danger of overdosing on cold and flu remedies? : I last had a cold (actually Man Flu, of course) about five years ago. My remedies are warmth, rest, sleep and food. Other than getting fatter, I'm prepared to take a chance that overdosing on any of those will not do me any harm at all. Next...

4) GRAVEYARDS - Finally, Goths are banned from taking photos in ‘Dracula’s Cemetery’ in Whitby. Are you disturbed by young people hanging around your local cemetery? : I'm not sure what the connection between "taking photos" and "hanging around" is, but I have no doubt that you have found one. We have a small cemetery literally just up the road. Other than relatives of the deceased and the chap who keeps it tidy I've never seen anybody else there. Oh, and I've never been to Whitby and I don't ever recall being a Goth.

 

Nice one Paddy! Four out of four totally irrelevant stories.

 

Now, go and get a proper job, do yourself a favour and remember the old saying when Vine's team next ask you to stand in for him: Just Say "No" !

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - but not today.