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Wednesday 18 April 2012

18/04/12


Time for another prompt-ish update, this is getting just like old times!

And to re-live those old times I need to suggest some BBC-related stories for you to discuss, and ignore, so here they are:

This is so BRILLIANT that I am going to reproduce it in full, and it is from your favourite daily rag too!
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-2128963/Coming-latest-Salford-news-Corporation-Street.html
Coming up after the latest Salford news Corporation Street
The BBC’s much-heralded move to a new Media City in Salford was finally completed this week. Critics say the £1.5 billion cost would have been better spent on programming. To celebrate its commitment to regional diversity, the corporation has drawn up an exciting new schedule . . .

6.00 Breakfast Presented by Bill Turnbull and the woman who cleans the offices at Media City. Events in the Middle East are analysed by the imam from Salford Central Mosque and the diplomatic correspondent of the Salford Advertiser.

9.00 Homes Under The Hammer Tearful BBC staff reluctantly put their fashionable West London homes on the market and embark on a new life in Salford.

10.00 Bargain Hunt BBC executives discover that they can buy an entire street for the price of a one-bedroom flat in Shepherds Bush. Unfortunately, the street in question is in Salford.

10.45 Location, Location BBC Director North Peter Salmon is looking a home close to his new place of work. Today, Kirsty and Phil show him properties in Notting Hill and a crash pad in Kensington.

11.30 Escape To The Country The Friday night exodus from Media City, Salford, as BBC executives head for their second homes in the Cotswolds. Presented by Bill Turnbull.

12.00 Home And Away The trials and tribulations of media executives forced to work in Salford while their families are hundreds of miles away in London. In today’s feature-length episode, Bill discovers his wife is having an affair with her personal trainer and Susanna is mugged on her way to the railway station.

1.00 News; Weather. Bill Turnbull brings you the latest headlines from around the world. Features a special report on a proposed pedestrianisation scheme in Salford. The long-range weather forecast predicts heavy rain in the Salford area.

1.45 Footballers’ Wives Waynetta Rooney meets the WAGs of Manchester United and Manchester City players at the nail bar and Brazilian wax salon in the Lowry Hotel, Manchester. Mario sets fire to his bathroom.

2.30 Helicopter Heroes In this special edition, members of the BBC senior management team fly from Battersea helipad to Media City, Salford, for a meeting before returning to London in time for dinner at The Ivy.

3.15 Pointless Popular quiz show in which contestants have to answer questions such as: why has the BBC wasted £1.5 billion of licence-payers’ money moving to Salford?

4.30 Great British Menu From the Salford Quays branch of Greggs. Top chefs compete for the honour of preparing a banquet for the Mayor of Salford. Tonight they try to create the perfect pasty while avoiding VAT at 20 per cent.

5.00 Deal Or No Deal BBC journalists, producers and secretaries are told that unless they agree to move to Salford they will be sacked.

6.00 News; Weather Bill Turnbull reports on the struggle for control of Salford Council’s Parks and Recreation Committee. Plus, how the North West is escaping the hosepipe ban.

6.30 Great British Railway Journeys Michael Portillo encounters engineering works at Crewe as he joins BBC Breakfast presenter Susanna Reid on a replacement bus service during her daily commute between London and Salford.

7.00 The One Show In an exclusive interview to mark the opening of Media City, Bill Turnbull talks to Manchester music scene legend Noel Gallagher, live by satellite from his home in Little Venice, West London.

7.30 Corporation Street The BBC’s brand new soap, designed to rival ITV’s Coronation Street. Television executives struggle to adapt to their new surroundings in Salford. Tonight Susanna tells Bill she returning to her husband in London.

8.00 Strictly Come Dancing From the Locarno Ballroom, Salford. The show gets a youthful revamp as 82-year-old Stuart Hall, from Ashton-under-Lyne, takes over as host from 84-year-old, Surrey-based Bruce Forsyth. Tonight’s celebrity dancers include Waynetta Rooney and Bill Turnbull.

9.00 Crimewatch North West Police appeal for witnesses after a BBC worker was shot with an air rifle while cycling home from work at Media City. Presented by Bill Turnbull and Salford PCSO Debbie Arkwright.

10.00 Match Of The Day From the City of Manchester Stadium. Features the top-of-the-table clash between Manchester City and Manchester United, followed by highlights of Manchester City Reserves v Manchester United Reserves and Manchester City Under-18s v Manchester United Under-18s. Presented by Bill Turnbull.

11.00 Newsnight New host Bill Turnbull presents a special investigation into how the BBC managed to spend £1.84 million on rail fares and another £77,000 on airline tickets after deciding to move operations from London to Salford.

11.45 The Graham Norton Show Bill Turnbull takes over as stand-in presenter after Graham Norton’s agent tells the BBC that the star refuses to travel to Salford because all his guests live in London. Tonight, Bill performs a musical duet with Salford superstar Morrissey of his seminal smash hit, Heaven Knows I’m Miserable Now.

A well-deserved Gold Star to Richard Littlejohn, I think.

More BBC news:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/bbc/9208714/BBC-spends-8m-on-20-redundancies.html
BBC spends £8m on 20 redundancies
The payments, made as compensation for loss of their jobs, include one single payment of nearly £1m to a top executive. Another was paid £600,000 and a third received £435,000 after taking either compulsory or voluntary redundancy. The figures, disclosed under the Freedom of Information Act, show a further three individuals received between £400,000 and £500,000 payments. Relating to the years 2005 to 2012, they show a dozen ex-employees were also awarded between £300,000 and £400,000.

Nice work if you can get it, eh?

Yesterday's furore over fracking continued for the rest of the day, with the BBC in full-flight Ram It Down Their Throats mode on every possible news bulletin. Richard Black must have had a busy day as he attempted to whip us in to an uncontrollable frenzy, and he even found time to write this: http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-17741416
 - Is shale gas the GM of energy? Unfortunately, in one household in North Wales his words washed over me in waves of suspicion. As I get older I am coming to the conclusion that if the BBC tell me something - anything - is really, really bad then it is probably nowhere near as bad as they say. My worry is that the BBC is SO concerned about a topic that it is prepared to dominate its broadcasts with that topic, and with little opportunity for ANY alternative viewpoint. An obvious question would be: Who at the BBC decides that this message must be rammed down our throats? A more sinister question is: Why is the message being rammed down our throats, and what does the BBC stand to gain from doing so? You get the "you must say this" memos, so go on, tell me. It can be our little secret.

You're doing your programme at the moment, and so far I have missed about 40 minutes of this...

1) QUANTITATIVE EASING - The policy of quantitative easing (or printing money) has either destroyed your savings and pensions or saved the economy from meltdown. Are old people suffering or young people benefitting from QE? : You said on Ken's show that "people over the age of 55 have wrecked the country" as they have benefitted from free university places, amongst other things, but you attempted to distance yourself from this assertion. So whose words are these? They are not mentioned in the BBC news page you link to. I'm not yet 55 and I did not go to university. Does that make me an innocent young person? Next...

2) NEIL HEYWOOD - The Government has been accused of caring more about pandas than the businessman who was murdered in China. How was Neil Heywood killed and what was the role of the Chinese Communist Party. Find out more in this article from the Telegraph : What, are you expecting somebody to call in and answer that question? Dream on Jeremy! And should I be surprised that there is no mention of pandas in the Telegraph's article that you link to? I thought not. And, as far as I am aware, a "government" (or, indeed, your radio programme) does not have emotions so therefore cannot care about anything, and that is constantly demonstrated. Next...

3) LOCAL NEWSPAPERS - Lots of local newspapers are being closed down, turned into weeklies or forced online. It’s not just democracy which suffers but paper boys and paper girls are losing their jobs. Find out more in this article from the Telegraph : Democracy? That'll be the democracy permitted by a newspaper editor or a radio programme host, will it? You last discussed this almost exactly a year ago on 20th April 2011 (LOCAL NEWSPAPERS - Local newspaper staff go on strike as three reporters are left to fill nine papers. Are local newspapers dying...or thriving on the web?). We do not have a daily local newspaper here (although we do have weeklies) and our nearest (but not exactly local) newsagent uses some bloke in a van to deliver newspapers, while at least one neighbour who feels the need for his daily fix of lies and scandal drives 7 miles every day just to go and get one. Poor soul. Anyway, you already know my views on this one:
DEATH TO THE DEAD TREE PRESS!
Less local newspapers means less journalists, which means less journalists feeding the UK population the biased, ill-informed, sensationalised, partisan, poorly researched, dictatorial lies that you and your ilk attempt to spoon-feed us every day. Perhaps one day you will all go and get proper jobs, but who in their right mind would employ an ex-journalist? Next...

4) SELF-DIAGNOSIS - Finally, the perils of going online for self-diagnosis. When you’re ill do you trust Dr. Google? : No.
 
Right, got to go now as Radcliffe & Maconie have just started their show ... real radio for those of us who do not need to be told what to think.
 
The Jeremy Vine Show - just checked, and Dr Google recommends euthanasia

3 comments:

gill said...

I heard JV on ken's bit trying to pronounce the Q part of QE. He used a particular venomous voice and then tried to distance himself. Noticed how he used an age just slightly that above himself, who earns a great deal of money, paid out of the public purse, and went to Uni himself. Obviously a waste of his education. He also said that it wasn't his programme, and then following Ken's surprise, said, no, it was Ken's programme. T****r!
He got all of a doo-dah about underwear too. Not a amn of the world are you JV?
I do love Pointless 'tho! I have onlt just discovered this gem of a programme, old style quiz shows, hurrah! Even if it does lean towards Family Fortunes. People are actually nice to each other, unlike Weakest Link etc

gill said...

That's man of the world!!

Stonyground said...

Newspapers are dying on their arses partly because they have been superceded by the internet and partly because they are mostly rubbish. The ones that are left would do well to check and re-check every single story to make sure that they have their facts right. When they make an error they need to post corrections promptly and prominently. They need to do this because the internet can link us to alternative views and original sources in seconds. Provided that you know how to do this, the internet becomes a much more reliable source of information.

Shame about the delivery boys and girls but times change.