Mmmmm.... bacon and mushroom sandwich....
You know, writing my blog is a real treat, and it continues to amaze me that so many people take time out from their busy days to read my rants and ramblings. As we head towards 4800 page views I again thank them for their continued support.
I also have to thank you Jeremy, for providing me with my daily ammunition. This week has been exceptional in that your web site lacky has managed to get your page updated before 11am, which means that I can start my diatribe earlier and have more time to think about what I am going to say to you. It allows me to have a quick read about the stories you are covering, rather than just believing what you want me to believe, and to sort the wheat from the chaff. So let's look at the chaff on offer today, and I bet you talk about Murdoch - again...
1) INDUSTRIAL PLANT EXPLOSION - An explosion at an industrial plant in Boston, Lincolnshire kills five people. One theory is they were illegally distilling vodka : Theory? And from the BBC news web page: "Claims the men may have been distilling illegal alcohol are being investigated", and "Nerys McGarry, from Lincolnshire Police, said it was not yet clear what had caused the blast", and "Mr Moore said it was still unclear what had caused the fire, but the intense heat and rapid spread suggested some form of accelerant", and "At this stage we cannot say what caused such intense heat or fire spread". So... just one thing missing then: Facts. And what do we do when we don't have the facts? C'mon Jeremy, you know the answer to this one.... Yes, that's right, well done: We make them up. And then we go on and on and on and on about what we have made up until somebody somewhere starts to believe what we are saying. I believe that this is what is taught in the first term at Journalist School. I am led to believe that the second term covers filling in an expenses claim, and the third covers all of the naughty things that only other journalists do. Needless to say, and with the strong possibility of a visit from your old friends Conjecture, Sensationalism and Speculation, it comes as absolutely no surprise to me that you are covering this story today. After all, what would be the point in waiting 24 hours when events might just be a little clearer and you may be able to tell us what REALLY happened? Oh yes, of course, it doesn't make good radio. Next...
2) RUPERT MURDOCH - Murdoch has withdrawn the bid for BSkyB. One commentator says it's not just bad for him, but this will spell the end of his empire : In your dreams maybe. A Murdoch story: I knew I wouldn't be disappointed. So which commentator is this then? The only one mentioned on the BBC news page you link to is Robert Peston, and his personal links with News International seem to be questioned by some, and as I mentioned yesterday (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2013684/Is-BBCs-Robert-Peston-close-Rupert-Murdochs-man-Will-Lewis.html). Meanwhile, the phone hacking scandal appears to be spreading to other news organisations, with Piers Morgan in the firing line in relation to his time at the Daily Mirror. We can only hope that that particular title disappears too. Are you going to mention Gordon Brown's appearance in the House of Commons yesterday? It was good to see him back and in his usual fine form, ignoring questions, avoiding answers and talking about his favourite subject: Himself. And I loved the way that some Tory-led Coalition MPs (to use common BBC parlance) called out "Bye bye, see you next year, have a great Christmas" as he left the chamber. Poor Gordon. Next...
3) FEAR OF DEATH - Do your perfectly healthy children lie awake at night, afraid of dying? We look at children who are obsessed with death : What children are those then? And like Ken, I cannot remember this happening to me. What's the betting that you run out of things to talk about and open this up to all sorts of irrational fears? This would allow you to poke fun at most of your listeners in one way or another. Spiders, heights, air travel, enclosed spaces, open spaces, dentists and needles must surely be fair game. Mine is cotton wool. I can't stand the stuff. I am sure it will be absolutely fascinating. Zzzzzzz... Next...
It is 11:35 and it this point I'll retract my thanks and congratulations for getting your web page updated promptly as the fourth item (something to do with parking in Edinburgh) is yet to appear....
<Goes away for 10 minutes...>
4) HOSPITAL CAR PARK - Doctors and nurses in Edinburgh who can't get into a hospital car park are having their cars vandalised by residents, who resent them parking there. Find out more in this Scotsman article : That wording is dreadful, but I think I know what you mean. However, this story could not be more irrelevant to me so I don't need to listen. Next...
How about doing some stories from the Daily Mail? You know, just for a change? I miss them...
And in your honour I have created a Twitter account ... I wonder what mischief I can get up to there.
You know, writing my blog is a real treat, and it continues to amaze me that so many people take time out from their busy days to read my rants and ramblings. As we head towards 4800 page views I again thank them for their continued support.
I also have to thank you Jeremy, for providing me with my daily ammunition. This week has been exceptional in that your web site lacky has managed to get your page updated before 11am, which means that I can start my diatribe earlier and have more time to think about what I am going to say to you. It allows me to have a quick read about the stories you are covering, rather than just believing what you want me to believe, and to sort the wheat from the chaff. So let's look at the chaff on offer today, and I bet you talk about Murdoch - again...
1) INDUSTRIAL PLANT EXPLOSION - An explosion at an industrial plant in Boston, Lincolnshire kills five people. One theory is they were illegally distilling vodka : Theory? And from the BBC news web page: "Claims the men may have been distilling illegal alcohol are being investigated", and "Nerys McGarry, from Lincolnshire Police, said it was not yet clear what had caused the blast", and "Mr Moore said it was still unclear what had caused the fire, but the intense heat and rapid spread suggested some form of accelerant", and "At this stage we cannot say what caused such intense heat or fire spread". So... just one thing missing then: Facts. And what do we do when we don't have the facts? C'mon Jeremy, you know the answer to this one.... Yes, that's right, well done: We make them up. And then we go on and on and on and on about what we have made up until somebody somewhere starts to believe what we are saying. I believe that this is what is taught in the first term at Journalist School. I am led to believe that the second term covers filling in an expenses claim, and the third covers all of the naughty things that only other journalists do. Needless to say, and with the strong possibility of a visit from your old friends Conjecture, Sensationalism and Speculation, it comes as absolutely no surprise to me that you are covering this story today. After all, what would be the point in waiting 24 hours when events might just be a little clearer and you may be able to tell us what REALLY happened? Oh yes, of course, it doesn't make good radio. Next...
2) RUPERT MURDOCH - Murdoch has withdrawn the bid for BSkyB. One commentator says it's not just bad for him, but this will spell the end of his empire : In your dreams maybe. A Murdoch story: I knew I wouldn't be disappointed. So which commentator is this then? The only one mentioned on the BBC news page you link to is Robert Peston, and his personal links with News International seem to be questioned by some, and as I mentioned yesterday (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2013684/Is-BBCs-Robert-Peston-close-Rupert-Murdochs-man-Will-Lewis.html). Meanwhile, the phone hacking scandal appears to be spreading to other news organisations, with Piers Morgan in the firing line in relation to his time at the Daily Mirror. We can only hope that that particular title disappears too. Are you going to mention Gordon Brown's appearance in the House of Commons yesterday? It was good to see him back and in his usual fine form, ignoring questions, avoiding answers and talking about his favourite subject: Himself. And I loved the way that some Tory-led Coalition MPs (to use common BBC parlance) called out "Bye bye, see you next year, have a great Christmas" as he left the chamber. Poor Gordon. Next...
3) FEAR OF DEATH - Do your perfectly healthy children lie awake at night, afraid of dying? We look at children who are obsessed with death : What children are those then? And like Ken, I cannot remember this happening to me. What's the betting that you run out of things to talk about and open this up to all sorts of irrational fears? This would allow you to poke fun at most of your listeners in one way or another. Spiders, heights, air travel, enclosed spaces, open spaces, dentists and needles must surely be fair game. Mine is cotton wool. I can't stand the stuff. I am sure it will be absolutely fascinating. Zzzzzzz... Next...
It is 11:35 and it this point I'll retract my thanks and congratulations for getting your web page updated promptly as the fourth item (something to do with parking in Edinburgh) is yet to appear....
<Goes away for 10 minutes...>
4) HOSPITAL CAR PARK - Doctors and nurses in Edinburgh who can't get into a hospital car park are having their cars vandalised by residents, who resent them parking there. Find out more in this Scotsman article : That wording is dreadful, but I think I know what you mean. However, this story could not be more irrelevant to me so I don't need to listen. Next...
How about doing some stories from the Daily Mail? You know, just for a change? I miss them...
And in your honour I have created a Twitter account ... I wonder what mischief I can get up to there.
UPDATE: And Galloway makes an appearance in the Murdoch item.
2 comments:
Shouldn't you tell us what your Twitter name is, so that we can follow you?
Ah yes, JVineBlogMan
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