Today's show 05/03/12

Monday again... and from your Twitter feed it appears you can be easily influenced. I'll explain more below in item 4...

1) GAY MARRIAGE - Gay marriage is ‘grotesque’ says Cardinal O’Brien, a leading light of the Catholic Church in Britain : He is entitled to his view, of course, and I have read that he has tried to put it across on both Radio 4 and Radio 5 this morning and only ended up getting a hammering from Messrs Humphries and Williams (standing in for Queen Nicky) respectively. Is there a BBC edict in force? You made no mention on Ken's show that he would be contributing to your programme today so perhaps common sense has prevailed and he has realised now that appearing on the BBC to defend his position is a pointless exercise. Instead you said "We have somebody who supports his view, and somebody who doesn't". Two "somebodys"? Blimey. I'll ask again: How do I achieve my life's ambition and become a somebody? Anyway, I'm not a Catholic, I am happily married to my wonderful wife and I do not need to be told what to think. I think you know what comes next: Next...

2) BLACKLIST - There is a blacklist of workers in the construction industry. Why are people put on it, and are you worried that you’ve been? Find out more in this artcile from the Guardian : What's an "artcile" then? I have never been involved in the construction industry, so I do not know how people are put on it, nor do I have any reason to know. On the same basis, I couldn't care less if I have been put on the blacklist. Perhaps I have ... that would certainly be an achievement! Next...

3) CIRCUMCISION - We discuss regretting circumcision. Perhaps it was done to you as a baby for religious reasons, or you were told by the doctors it was necessary and then found out it wasn’t? : Surely you are not discussing this after I suggested it on Friday? It was in response to your witchcraft story that I wrote: I can think of at least two religions whose followers legally mutilate their children in the name of their faith. Perhaps you should discuss that one day?. If so, I am flattered! I had some sympathy with Ken this morning when you brought this up on his show, and was glad that he moved you on quickly. I have no regrets about my own situation and I'll leave whether I have been subject to this particular treatment as a secret between me and my underpants, thank you. Next...

 

4) LIBERAL DEMOCRATS - Lembit Opik brings out a book on how the Liberal Democrats can get their mojo back. Are you more likely to vote Lib Dem if they get rid of Nick Clegg?: My answer to your question is "No". It was yesterday evening that Lembit Opik tweeted you with:

You said on Ken's show "... he wants to come on ..." and he has been "... spending time thinking ...". I bet he wants to come on! Your programme seems to revel in giving free publicity to authors whose books I will NEVER read, and this is just another one of many. And instead of "spending time thinking" why doesn't Opik just go and get a proper job so that he can experience The Real World in which the rest of us live, and who he fails to represent. If nothing else, it would stop him from cropping up on crappy TV game shows (for example, Pointless Celebrities - never has a game show been more accurately titled) and doing cringeworthy stuff like this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LYXzNhzYdTU. Perhaps then he might just earn some respect from me.

 

I'll finish with another quote from Ken's show: "We're quite excited, as we always are". Well, bully for you Jeremy. Please rest assured that there are many of us who are as far away from excitement about your programme as it is possible to be.

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - definitely in need of circumcision

Today's show 21/07/11

I'm still unable to follow @theJeremyVine on Twitter, so I can only assume that you have blocked me from doing so. I suspose this is only fair as it is the equivalent of my radio's Off switch and which I have used oh, so often to end your broadcasts in to my home. I also suppose that "Tell us what you think" really does only apply to those people who like your programme, and the rest of us have to "put up or shut up". Public service broadcasting at its best, eh?

I see you have a Murdoch-free programme today. Your faux concern yesterday that other stories (euro, famine and Libya) were being lost in the flood of Murdoch/hacking/Met Police/Cameron stories raised my curiousity and a quick search of the BBC News web pages for July 20th revealed 30 stories for "hacking", 12 for "euro", 10 for "famine" and 5 for "Libya". So, just remind me again, who is at fault for the alleged over-coverage of Murdoch et al. Remember too that we, the listeners, do not get a say (not even on Twitter apparently) of what YOU decide to brainwash us with each day. As they say on one of my favourite web sites (http://biased-bbc.blogspot.com/):

Bias - it is as easy as B - B - C.

So, let's look at today's white elephants in the room, and so eloquently tweeted this morning before 9am as Coppers. Grief. Larry. Undeserving...

1) GRIEF - Lucy Harris was jailed for stealing £39,000. Her mother (who she also stole from) says she should be shown clemency because she was grieving for the death of her father. Is grief an excuse? Find out more in this Telegraph article : According to the Telegraph, Ms Harris seems to be going through the correct legal procedure and I have no doubt that Judge Mettyear will come to his own conclusions in due course. What puzzles me is: Why do you think that this is of interest to me? And you have ex-MP Lembit Opik (star of BBC's Pointless Celebrities) on to tell us why he accidentally claimed more expenses than he should have done due to grief. Well, that's one explanation I suppose. I think he is going to get his own blog label today as he is becoming a new Talking Head for your show. Can I remind you that he is an ex-MP? I wonder why that might be....? Next...

2) LARRY GOULD - A successful entrepreneur who's made millions tells us anyone can be a businessman: even the long-term unemployed and public sector workers : I'm puzzled why you have chosen to single out public sector workers. There is almost a suggestion that you consider them to be inferior to private sector workers. Hardly fair, in my opinion. I already run my own one-man business, so this is of no interest to me today as I am busy working. Next...

3) THE DESERVING AND UNDESERVING POOR - Is it possible to say there is a distinction between the deserving poor, and the undeserving poor? If you're poor and feckless, should you have your satellite dish taken away? : Patronising the poor ... are you proud of what you do? Did you consider linking this with the previous item? Perhaps Larry Gould could tell some of the poor (both deserving and undeserving) how to start their own business. Or perhaps not. Next...

4) POLICE - Have you been horrified that some of the police who bungled the phone hacking inquiry were also responsible for anti-terrorism? Are there too many stupid policemen? Should you need a degree to be a copper? : Am I horrified? No. Are there too many stupid policemen? I have no idea, but YouTube features many films of dubious police behaviour. Should they need a degree? What would happen to all of those that don't have a degree, and how many would be left? Is this going to change anything? No.

Today's show in four words then:
Illegal. Deluded. Patronising. Irrelevant.

Today's show 07/07/11

And as the BBC descends in to hysteria and apoplexy, let's take a look at today's dose of News Entertainment...

1) PHONE HACKING SCANDAL - Are the News of the World phone hacking allegations the equivalent for journalists to the MPs expenses scandal? Which should the public feel more let down by? : Again, I need more than one paragraph today...

Some years ago, there used to be a TV advert for McCain oven chips where a little girl was asked by here sister which she preferred: Daddy or Chips? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aHA4-5N5AzA) You seem to be asking much the same question today, but the answer is easier: MPs are elected and accountable to their constituents. The only accountability that journalist scum are interested in concerns how much they can fiddle out of their own expenses.

Perhaps you are starting to realise why I and many others do not trust ANYTHING that The Media attempts to tell us these days. Jeremy, irrespective of phone hacking THIS IS A REAL PROBLEM for you and your ilk. What can be done to restore (or create in my case) the public's faith in what you say? And it is no surprise to see that BBC heavyweights Nick Robinson and Robert Peston cannot agree on the reporting of this story (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/celebritynews/8621020/Nick-Robinson-highlights-Robert-Pestons-Vanity.html). If nothing else, this shows that they consider the reporting (and who did it first) more important than the story itself. Scum.

The BBC is not immune to dubious and illegal activities, with the phone vote rigging scandal being perhaps the most memorable of recent times. Pot, kettle and black?

As you are a journalist I cannot trust you to tell me anything, so I won't be listening. Tell me, what is it like being a journalist at the moment? Can you feel the hate? Next...

2) BARBECUE ACCIDENTS - Have you suffered a barbecue accident? : Yes, I once burnt some beefburgers, but we ate them anyway. Does that count? You just said on Ken's show, "Whether she went to sleep or not I don't know". That sounds like poor research to me. Perhaps you should do some investigation and find out. Or, you could just make it up. Next...

3) OVERNIGHT CARE - A disabled former ballerina is denied an overnight carer to help her use a commode. It's said it would cost £22,000 a year. Is that a price worth paying for her dignity - or too much to spend on one person in straightened times? : I have no idea, or interest. Next...

4) ANTI-DEPRESSANTS - A new study suggests a third of British women have taken anti-depressants. Are they prescribed too readily? In some cases, would it have been better to put away the Prozac and just feel sad? Find out more in this Daily Mail article : I am not a woman and I have never taken Prozac. We can only be grateful that that bastion of true virtue, exceptional reporting and fantastic journalism The Daily Mail is managing to keep a firm grip on reality while the other members of the Dead Tree Press Preservation Society disappear up their own backsides in an attempt to rubbish one of their own. Where would your programme be without it?


UPDATE:

Lembit Opik? I know what he was, but can you just remind what he is now and why what he says should be of any concern to me?

He appeared as a TV game show contestant on Pointless Celebrities last night. Never has a TV progamme had a more accurate title.