16/04/12 and 17/04/12

Tuesday, and I've just listened to your diatribe with Ken. As usual, there was nothing to give me any confidence that you have even the slightest clue what you are talking about, but let's have a quick look at yesterday's programme first...

1) ANDERS BREIVIK - It’s the trial in Norway of Anders Breivik, accused of murdering 77 people. Is Norway treating him more liberally then we would in Britain? : And the point of this question is what, exactly? Norway has its legal system, and we have ours. Now get over it. Next...

2) STILES - There’s a report that in Dartmoor, people want the stiles to be removed from country walks, because disabled and overweight people are having trouble getting over them. Find out more in this article from the Daily Mail : Another one from the Mail, so it must be true. And your discussion with Ken today confirms that to be true. So what? Slow news day, was it? Next...

3) I LOVE WHERE I LIVE - We launch a Radio 2 special which celebrates every single part of the United Kingdom, “I love where I live”. It’s a one-minute love letter to your town, place or village : I love where I live, that's why I live here. Easy! Next...

4) BIONICS - We meet the fifteen-year old with a bionic arm. He lost the arm when he was very young, now science has replaced it : Wonderful!

On to today then...

1) FRACKING - Today we debate fracking: Will it create almost limitless supplies of cheap natural gas, or will it cause earthquakes and ruin the environment? : I must have missed the news the day the Blackpool Tower collapsed and fell in to the sea following the "earthquake" last year... The word "debate" usually means a frank discussion by parties of differing views. You mentioned on Ken's show that your (only?) guest on this item would be somebody from the "Ribble Estuary Against Fracking" (REAF, presumably) campaign. And your other guest, who will argue the benefits of fracking will be ... non-existent, presumably. I'd had enough of this listening to Chris Evans this morning who gave the kind of one-sided argument of which you would have been proud. My opinion on fracking is of no matter, but I do object to you and your colleagues continuing with your biased messages. It was on 24th May that you last discussed this, and a subsequent email exchange between myself and so-called BBC Science Correspondent Roger Harrabin failed to give me any kind of impression that he had a clue what he was talking about:

Me: You said: "It is the fracking process - creating tiny explosions to shatter hard shale rocks and release gas 10,000 feet underground - that has caused so much controversy in the US. Some householders claim that shale gas leaking into their drinking supply causes tap water to ignite.". The suggestion is that shale gas percolates nearly two miles up through the earth's crust and then seeps through metal or plastic pipes containing water under pressure and then bursts in flames out of water taps with no source of ignition. Would you care to suggest how this can happen? Do you have any documentary evidence of such an occurrence?

Harrabin: Many share your incredulity.

Me: So you made it up then? No facts, no news!

Harrabin: No that's silly

If he can't explain his own writings, why would you be any different? And I've just listened to Richard Black spout his usual biased rubbish, and he'll get a gold star from somebody for crow-barring "global warming" in to the discussion. Well done Richard, I don't believe a word you say! And I've also listened to the woman from REAF who, shall we say, failed to convince me that she even knows what day of the week it is. Presumably the people you speak to (a) use electricity, (b) hate nuclear energy, (c) hate the burning of fossil fuels, and (d) fail to acknowledge the inefficiency and impracticality of wind farms. Unfortunately they also fail to come up with any other alternative, other than a UK with no electricity.

So let me re-word that question for you: Will it create almost limitless supplies of cheap natural gas, or will the UK media cause so much hysteria amongst an ill-informed population that any possible benefits will be missed? Next...

2) EMERGENCY LANDING - A Virgin Atlantic plane makes an emergency landing at Gatwick Airport. Some passengers said the cabin crew panicked. We investigate : You? Investigate? Don't make me laugh. You don't investigate anything. You'll read it in the Daily Mail. You said on Ken's show, "We're still checking the facts". Checking the facts? Blimey ... it has never bothered you before, why is this story so different? After all, you didn't bother to check the facts when talking about Chris Davies MEP's earnings, did you? Next...

3) WIRRAL COUNCIL - Should Wirral council be sponsoring its local football club Tranmere Rovers, when it’s closing down care homes for the elderly? Find out more in this article from The Telegraph : Oooh, a vote. I don't live on the Wirral and I hate football so, and on the basis that you like everybody to have an opinion, here is mine: I could not care less. Next...

4) SAILING MISHAPS - A father and son who bought a yacht from an online auction site crashed it into the rocks off Guernsey. We hear tales of inexperienced idiots and sailing mishaps : And your special guest will be the captain of the Costa Concordia, presumably? Radio about idiots made by idiots presumably for idiots. Target audience! Get Richard Black back on.

The Jeremy Vine Show - not today, thank you


UPDATE: After a visit to http://biased-bbc.com I was reminded of this:
http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/jamesdelingpole/100111487/how-many-died-in-the-great-blackpool-earthquake-of-11/

Today's show 10/01/12

Sincere apologies to my readers for the late update today as your staff were slacking again and the web page was not updated until 11:45ish. And this despite your tweet at 08:45 this morning that said: Today's stories @BBCRadio2 in four words: Worrall. Major. Train. Miliband. See you at noon. There is a lack of connectivity here, don't you think?

Anyway, your programme is just starting ... hang on a second ... there, that's better. 6 Music is on now.

So let's look at today's poorly researched discussion topics, all complete with the personal bias for which you are becoming famous...

1) SHOPLIFTING - Antony Worrall Thompson has said he’s sorry for shoplifting but has no idea why he did it. If you were caught shoplifting, what was your excuse? : I have never shoplifted in my life, so I don't need an excuse. Next...

2) HIGH SPEED RAIL - Amidst fierce opposition, the government is giving the go-ahead for the high speed rail link to Birmingham. Are you someone who says ‘I wish I had a high speed train to my town’? : Yes, I am, but being out in "the sticks" it is never going to happen. Your own "anti" viewpoint came shining through during your chat with Ken earlier when you suggested HS2 would only be finished "when we're all dead". Did you think the same about the Channel Tunnel? Did you think the same about HS1 (Channel Tunnel to St Pancras International)? Both were finished long before you and I were dead, so what is your point? HS2 will free up a huge amount of capacity on the already over-stretched London to Birmingham line, a line so busy that it is virtually impossible to run a freight train on it during the day. I am reminded of the huge number of protestors in France who were involved in violent clashes with police during the construction of that country's TGV routes. However, they were not protesting about the route destroying their countryside. They were protesting that the route did not come near enough to their town so that they could make use of it! Your point-of-view will be, of course, that this is all a huge waste of tax payers' money. Well, next time you get in your car remember that all of the roads that you drive on are also funded by us - the tax payers - and whether we use them or not. So what is the difference? I loved your comment on Ken's show when you said "... using what is called a Y-shaped route ..." when referring to the future extensions north to Liverpool, Manchester and elsewhere. I wonder, could that term have been used because it is shaped like a letter Y? Just a guess. You have already made your point of view clear, and knowing that you will dismiss any argument that goes against it and that you will not have researched this topic in any depth at all, I see no need to listen to your ramblings today. Next...

3) LANDMINE DOG - A dog that helped the military defuse countless landmines, and was put down last night, is being mourned. Is it right to use animals in warfare? Find out more from the Telegraph : Oooh, a vote. We've not had one of these for ages. I'm sure that everybody from the MoD to the Taliban will be awaiting the result with interest. Next... 

4) ED MILIBAND - The Labour leader admits that a future Labour government will have a lot less money to spend because of the deficit. Have you got a great new political policy idea that won’t cost any money? : Yes, scrap or privatise the BBC. Easy. What a shame that you are not talking about what Miliband is saying today.

The Jeremy Vine Show - radio for "when we're all dead"

Today's show 15/11/11

Ref. Lou Reed: On Ken's show, "... it wasn't as bad as I thought it was ...". Jeremy, it was worse than you thought it was.

 

A quick look at the four reasons not to listen today...

1) PETROL PRICES - Should the government scrap the planned rise in petrol duty? : Ah, a vote. Text your answer to 88291 everybody! Odd, don't you think, that the government are getting a load of flak about this, but it was - I understand - the previous Labour government who put these tax rises in place. I'll let you know if the number of jet skis at our local beach reduces next year. Odd again, don't you think, that non-EU, non-oil-producing, low tax, referendums-for-everything, libertarian Switzerland pays considerably less for petrol than we do (http://www.drive-alive.co.uk/fuel_prices_europe.html). Some connection, maybe? Next...

2) METAL THEFT - How do we stop Britain's metal theft epidemic? : You last discussed this on 26th August and - guess what - nothing has changed. On that basis I'll repeat what I said then: This is a real problem, and one of which I am only too aware. The main part of the problem does not lie with the people who take the metal but with the scrap merchants who will exchange it for cash with no questions asked. Thefts would be reduced if it were made more difficult to get the material in to the scrap metal process, and the easiest way to do that is to make each delivery traceable. There is a government e-petition on this subject (http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/406) and an interesting article here:

http://www.scrap-ex.com/news_events/news/metal/scrap_dealers_go_cashless_says_minister.html

Something needs to change, but - as usual - you will only talk about it and I feel that I already know enough on this topic. I had dealings with many scrap metal merchants 25 years ago, and I never met one with a conscience. Next...

3) PARENTS IN PRISON - In the run up to Children In Need, we look at the stories behind the charity. Did your parent go to jail when you were a child? How did you cope? : No, and I didn't have to. Next...

4) CABS - Oxford Council wants to record all conversations that take place in the city's cabs. Good for the safety of passengers and drivers - or an invasion of privacy? : What a shame that you chose not to link to Big Brother Watch's version of events (http://www.bigbrotherwatch.org.uk/home/2011/11/big-brother-watching-listening.html) instead of a BBC news page. If you had bothered to check you would have found that this item is a NON-STORY. From the BBW page:
Update:
This has generated a great deal of interest, so Big Brother Watch has been digging. And we’ve found no document that suggests Oxford City Council’s licensing committee has ever approved this. Two reports have been published – one, for the 19 October meeting, outlines the planned changes to licensing conditions. Earlier in the year, a meeting on March 1 heard the initial proposal. Both documents discuss CCTV, and make no mention of audio recording. There is one missing document – the Appendix A discussed on 19 October, which outlines the actual changes planned. That isn’t available on the Council’s website however. We have asked the Officer responsible for a copy.
Update 2:
We’ve now been given the Council’s Appendix. It makes no mention of audio recording, only CCTV and “image retrieval”.
Did Councillors on the committee even discuss this?

So, there is nothing to discuss and you are believing the hype appearing in your beloved "Media". Fortunately BBW have the courage and sense to correct their side of events, but The Media will continue with their lies because they make good headlines. You will, of course, have a spokesman from Oxford City Council on the phone, so this should be a great item! You know what, I'd listen to this but frankly Radcliiffe and Maconie on 6 Music will be a lot better.

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - Making up the news, every day

Today's show 07/11/11

Monday morning, so this shouldn't take long...

I hear that you stood in for Andrew Marr on TV yesterday morning. I can only hope that you asked your guests if any of them wanted a park bench as a memorial, if they had ever been injured by an umbrella, if they had ever had a piss in a hedge, whether they had ever had an argument in a car, and whether they refused to have naked pictures taken by a partner. After all, these are the questions were posed to your poor Radio 2 listeners recently so they must be important, or is it one rule for "us" and one rule for "them"?

I was surprised to hear you say on Chris Evans' programme this morning (when the Mystery Guest feature was no more than a promotion for your programme) that you have a meeting at 08:10 to decide the four stories to be covered each day. Why, then, is your web page not updated until at least two and sometimes three hours later?

 

Today's issue that affects me: Shall I go to the post office now, or later this afternoon?

Right, as the lights dim in London's West End while the Sympathetic Voice Generator is slowly brought back in to operation, let's move on to this Monday's meandarings...

1) M5 PILE UP - The M5 pile up on Friday night was almost certainly the worst for a generation. How do you react in a motorway crash? : While I have every sympathy for those involved on Friday, fortunately I have never been involved in a motorway crash, so I have no idea. My only involvement up until now is to sit in the resulting traffic jam while the investigations are carried out and think to myself "It wasn't like this 30 years ago". Did you know that in some USA states it is illegal to leave your damaged vehicle on the carriageway after an accident, and it must be removed immediately? Of course you didn't. I think it odd that the litigation culture that we have allegedly acquired from the USA has mutated in to something more than they have. With nearly every crash site now branded a Crime Scene, perhaps the words Road Accident can be removed from our vocabulary as there is, apparently, no such thing as an accident any more. Next...

2) NUCLEAR WEAPONS - If it can be proved that Iran is developing nuclear weapons, should we support a pre-emptive strike by Israel? : I'd like to hear Galloway's opinion before forming my own. Any chance you could get him on today? I'll then text my answer to 88291 so that you can collate it with the other votes and send the results to David Cameron, who will no doubt be awaiting your decision. Next...

3) CINDERELLA'S UGLY SISTERS - The Lighthouse Theatre in Kettering is staging a production of Cinderella and they’ve called the ugly sisters Beatrice and Eugenie after the Duke of York’s daughters. Is this acceptable? Find out more in this article from the Telegraph : If the cap fits.... Or should that be: If the ridiculous hat fits? Meanwhile, add my name to your list of people who could not care less. I'm sure the Lighthouse Theatre will thank you for the blatant advertising of their show. Next...

4) THE SONGS MY SON LOVED - All this week at 1:30 on Radio 2, Jeremy Vine presents a documentary where mothers tell the story of their sons that died in conflict through the music they loved: ‘The Songs My Son Loved’. Find out more from the BBC Radio 2 episode page : No comment, other than to ask: Were no daughters killed then?

 

I'll be listening to 6 Music if you want me.

Today's show 04/11/11

Aha! Somebody has actually done their job today and managed to get your web page updated before your programme finishes today. I hope that whoever was responsible for yesterday's failure to do this simple task will be docked a day's pay, or sacked.

Today's issue that affects me: Seriously, you are just taking the p155 out of your listeners, right? Go on, you can tell me. It will be our secret. I won't tell anybody, I promise.

You just said on Ken's show "Have you got that Friday feeling that we are running out of stories?". A quick scan of today's tedium tells me that you definitely are running out but surprisingly you have chosen not to cover such news highlights as these:

 

http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/jamesdelingpole/100115390/why-does-the-bbc-so-hate-britain/
Why does the BBC so hate Britain?

It's long since time that the BBC was forced to recognise its responsibilities as our compulsory, near-monopoly broadcaster. If the only people who funded it were tofu-eating metropolitan anti-capitalist bien-pensants who all believed in renewable energy with the same blind ideological fervour as Chris Huhne then the BBC would be perfectly within its rights to broadcast this Spartist drivel. But they're not. The BBC's job is also to represent – or try to represent – the interests of people who are shocked by rising energy bills, who are desperately worried about Britain's economic future, who might benefit from a job working in or servicing the shale gas industry, who innocently believe (in their sweet but oh-so-naive way) that the British Broadcasting Corporation's true purpose is to broadcast for Britain.

I could not have put it better myself. And talking of the BBC, how about this one...?

 

http://www.journalism.co.uk/news/nuj-to-ballot-on-no-confidence-vote-in-bbc-director-general/s2/a546591/
NUJ to ballot on no-confidence vote in BBC director general

Union announces first no-confidence vote in a BBC director general in response to the broadcaster's Delivering Quality First programme
"NUJ members are committed to defending jobs and quality journalism at the BBC and we are asking readers, listeners and viewers to join with us in this battle. And that is why we will be organising the no confidence ballot against Mark Thompson, the architect of this butchery."

While there is no danger of your programme ever providing "quality journalism", I am left asking myself the question: When can I hear quality journalism on the BBC? Go on, give me a clue. And the NUJ can ask me - as a listener and viewer - to join with them, but it is not going to happen. How about you? How are you going to vote?

You also missed this piece of Shock Horror news from the Telegraph:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/celebritynews/8869151/Stephen-Frys-flight-diverted-after-engine-shut-down.html

Stephen Fry's flight diverted after engine shut down

A UK-bound plane carrying 250 passengers, including actor and comedian Stephen Fry, was forced to make an unscheduled landing after an engine was shut down mid-flight.
Flight QF31 flew for around two-and-a-half hours with three functioning engines before landing safely in Dubai. None of the 258 passengers or 25 crew on board the Qantas Airbus A380 were injured, a spokeswoman for the airline said.

This would have allowed you to waste 30 minutes of your listeners' lives with another of your sensationalist "Has anything ever happened to you?" items. You've not done one of those for a while.

I have made PLENTY of story suggestions for you over the past 10 months, which you continue to ignore. There is, of course, another alternative: If you have nothing to say, say nothing!

 

So let's take a quick look at how you will successfully avoid quality journalism today...

1) IMF - Should Britain give money to the IMF even if some of it goes to save the Euro? : Oh good, a vote. Should I text "Yes" or "No" to 88291? Plenty of opportunity here to expel sufficient hot air to inflate a passenger-carrying balloon, but it is not going to influence the minds of those who make these decisions, is it? Changing nothing again, as usual. Next...

2) UMBRELLAS - Have you ever been injured by an umbrella? : No. Georgi Markov was, and didn't live to tell the tale. There is only one possible solution: BAN ALL UMBRELLAS, NOW! I think you'd better get Galloway on the phone for an expert opinion though. I don't own an umbrella and cannot remember ever using one. Quality journalism this is not. Next...

3) INSURANCE - We’re joined by Martin Lewis. Every year insurance companies find new things that we need to insure ourselves against. But what insurance do we really need to buy and what can we do without? : Thanks, but we're already sorted out for this, and we always take Martin's advice from his web site when looking for new or replacement policies, so I have no need to listen. I wonder if anybody does umbrella injury insurance....? Next...

4) HEDGES - Is it ever right to use a hedge for a loo? Find out more in this article from the Daily Mail : And all is right with the world as you end the week with a story from the Daily Mail, and which confirms that this is anything but quality journalism. Well done!

Oh, and I am very pleased to see that my blog is picking up readers by people entering "jeremy vine naked photos" in to Google (currently the fifth item displayed). Every reader counts Jeremy, so thanks for that.

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - running out of stories, again

Today's show 12/10/11

Welcome back! I get far more satisfaction from my daily missive when you are there, rather than one of your unfortunate stand-ins. Is it a deliberate policy that they get stitched-up with some utterly appalling stories while you are away?

Paddy managed to include a story nicked from the Daily Mail on all three days. I am sure that he will appreciate your congratulations on that one. And good to see too that links to newspaper web sites have reappeared on your own web page. Perhaps my complaint did make a difference, after all.

But next time you go away, can we have somebody else stand-in for you? I've already suggested Noel Gallagher to you, and reading and listening to what he has said just in the last day shows that he really is the man for the job. I am told that on last night's Newsnight he said, "We were working class. There’s a level beneath us now. The can’t-be-bothered-working class.". And I heard him this morning on Radio 2's 08:00 news talking about an invitation by Simon Cowell to be an X-Factor judge when he said, "... and I wouldn't want any of those people coming around my house and crying in my kitchen". This is the kind of attitude I would *LOVE* to hear on your show, rather than the patronising faux sympathy that your listeners get at the moment.

One Daily Mail story that Paddy missed was this fascinating piece about our beloved BBC (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2047283/Deaf-viewers-complain-standard-BBC-subtitles.html):
BBC turns Ed Miliband into Ed Miller Band: Deaf viewers complain about standard of corporation's subtitles

During the Queen Mother’s funeral, a solemn call for silence became ‘we will now have a moment’s violence’.

Well, it made me laugh.

Can I guess what the documentary was that you were recording? Was it a report on the declining standards of news reporting in this country and the consequent disbelief by the UK public? Perhaps it was the story of somebody who didn't bother buying a TV licence, ignored the threatening letters, told the henchmen to get off his property and then found that nothing happened? How about a simple and concise explanation of how an oil-fired central heating system works? Or why, after all of the media "we're all going to die" hysteria, nothing has been heard from the same media about the Fukushima nuclear power plant for months now? Oh, no, hang on... I've got it! It was entitled "Howard Schultz - Wake Up And Smell The Starbucks Coffee" and was an insight in to that great man and the company that he runs. Yes, that'll be it, I'm sure.

You'll be interested to know, I'm sure, that my blog is only two views short of 8000 page views. That is EIGHT THOUSAND. I'm very proud of that. I hope you are too. Readership is boosted, of course, by my mentions of it on your Twitter feed (I get a LOT of readers from your Twitter account) and by my regular readers promoting it on forums to which they subscribe. For example, my good friend Stonyground did exactly that a couple of days ago (http://www.countingcats.com/?p=10969) which elicited this well-considered response from Westerlyman:
I also listen Radio 2 quite often especially when I am driving but, like Stoneyground, I cannot bear the Jeremy Vine show. Unlike you Stoneyground I am now unable to even listen to it as I fear that I will have a serious RTA when I smash my fist through the windscreen through apoplexy. I usually switch to Classic fm which calms me down.
I have no idea whether Jeremy Vine is a man whose company I would enjoy or not but he is such a snivelling leftie tic on his radio show that, unless this is all an act in order to advance his career, I seriously doubt it. My biggest gripe with him, and most other BBC presenters, is that they appear to live in a separate universe from me. JV appears to have trouble listening to any kind of nuanced argument. He can ask someone a question. An intelligent and detailed answer is given and JV summarises and by doing so demonstrates that he has usually missed the point completely. Its either this or deliberate obfuscation when something is said that is ‘not acceptable’. Arrrrrgh!

Beautifully written. You see Jeremy, it really is not just me!

Today's issue that affects me: What IS that smell?

Moving on then to today's reasons to switch to 6 Music at 12...

1) CRIMINAL INJURIES COMPENSATION - A policeman in Newcastle has been found guilty of multiple rapes. A number of the victims are not eligible for Criminal Injuries Compensation because they have criminal convictions of their own. Women’s groups say this is not fair. Find out more from the Sunderland Echo : From what I read, the CICA are following the rules by which they have to abide, a bit like the BBC's Freedom of Information Department abiding by the rule that says they won't say anything about BBC programmes. So, what are you going to do? Start a campaign to get the rule changed, or just talk about it? Now let me think.... Next...

2) EUROMILLIONS WINNERS - If you won £100million on the Lottery, surely you would tick the no publicity box? : Yes, I would. I guess it would help if I had ever bought a lottery ticket though. Next...

3) WHEELIE BIN THEFT - Has your wheelie bin been stolen? Reports around the country say there have been increased thefts of council bins : I've just been outside - in the rain - and checked, and both of ours (green for household waste, brown for garden waste) are still there. Phew! You had me worried for a moment. So, these "reports from around the country" - where are they? A quick search for "wheelie bin thefts" gives me details of a product that clamps two bins together, supposedly making them more difficult to steal, but the only "theft reports" I can find all seem to be from some time ago with several from 2007 and one from December 2010. While acknowledging that there is a problem, is this what passes for headline news on your programme? Next...

4) PLAYGROUND ENTREPRENEUR - Finally, the 12 year old who was suspended from school for selling chocolate and fizzy drinks to his classmates. Were the school right or could he be the next Lord Sugar? : Lord Sugar, fizzy drinks, chocolate ... tee hee, very good. If your listeners decided that the school is wrong, is the school bound by this decision to change their rules and allow him to continue? I thought not.

The Jeremy Vine Show - deliberate obfuscation, every day

Today's show 07/10/11

Bloomin' heck... you're going to talk about the BBC...

1) QUANTITATIVE EASING - The Bank of England is pumping another seventy five billion pounds into the economy through quantitative easing. Dangerous folly or essential in the worst financial crisis in our history? : Ooohhh... a vote! "Text your answer to 88291, and we will forward the results to George Osbourne and Mervyn King, who will be waiting for your instructions". But they won't, of course. I'd vote for "dangerous folly", I think, but others may think differently. Not that it will make ANY difference, of course. Next...

2) BBC CUTS - There will be more more repeats as the BBC reduces its spending. Do you look forward to more classics from the archive? : I think I need more than one paragraph for this...

 

The Daily Telegraph (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/bbc/8812454/Thousands-of-jobs-to-go-as-BBC-shrinks.html) tells us today:
The announcement that 2,000 jobs are to go across the corporation was undermined by the National Union of Journalists, which sent an email to staff confirming that it had secured an agreement that those who left under the cuts programme would be free to “return to the BBC on a freelance or casual basis after three months from their departure date”. The agreement comes after criticism that BBC staff routinely take redundancy payments only to return to the corporation as freelance “consultants”.

I'll leave it for others to decide if that counts as "cuts", or not.

Apparently Director General Mark Thompson told the 25,000 staff yesterday that the BBC is “still the biggest employer of journalists, outside of China.”. Hmmmm... UK population: 62 million. China population 1.331 billion. Room for some improvement there then!

 

The ruling earlier this week about the pub landlady and her Greek satellite receiver may also have an effect in the future. Although the ruling currently only relates to football and national borders at the moment it will be interesting to see if the same thinking can be applied to the BBC TV licence where non-ownership prevents us from watching non-BBC channels and raises questions about the freedom to provide services for commercial TV companies.

As for your programme, well there are obvious cuts that could be made. I'm sure that a small fortune could be saved by not wheeling in your band of Talking Heads so often. You know the ones: Galloway, Monbiot, Opik, etc., and even Terry Walton too.

 

I have also just found this http://www.thetruthseeker.co.uk/?p=35391 which I feel needs closer scrutiny than I have time for today. We'll come back to that another time!

 

You know what, I might even listen to this. Not to be influenced by what you say, of course, but merely to see how you handle the discussion. I could even call in, but I would need a false name and I could end my call with a disparaging remark. Now let me think...

 

Oh, and the classic from the archive I would like to hear again is JV vs Howard Schultz from Starbucks. Any chance?

 

3) YOUR MONEY AND YOUR LIFE - Martin Lewis tells listeners what to cut if they've cut everything else : Top bloke, and top advice - which we have already taken. Next...

4) POLICE CHASE - We discuss the seventy-six year old motorist who drove the wrong way round a roundabout and caused a seventeen mile police chase. Read the full story at Mail Online : Finally, the return of the Daily Mail, and the return of links to newspaper web sites. Is this an exception, or will they be back on a regular basis now? As for the story, I think you are confusing me with somebody who might be interested.

Today's show 17/08/11

I'm very busy today so I shall give your programme the attention it deserves: Not much!

1) ENTERPRISE ZONES - The government has announced a wave of new enterprise zones in England to boost economic growth. Could one transform your town? Did that happen when they were first introduced in the 1980s? : I live in Wales, not England, so how can this have any relevance to me? Next...

 

2) RIOT SENTENCING - Are the authorities being too draconian following the riots? Two men are each given four years in jail for inciting disorder via Facebook without going out on the streets themselves : England-only again, and another vote. I'll have a think about it and text "Yes" or "No" to 88291 when I have decided. Will you be starting a campaign to get them released if the overwhelming opinion of your listeners is "Yes"? I thought not. Next...

 

3) MATT HAMPSON - After 1, a former rugby player who was paralysed from the neck down in a scrum accident tells us what it’s like to live as a tetraplegic. Find out more in this Telegraph article : Having read the Telegraph article, I admire his determination to live his life to the full, but I do not feel any need to switch back to Radio 2 from 6 Music to listen. Next...

4) HERPES - And a man who knowingly gave his girlfriend herpes is jailed for fourteen months. Find out more in this Metro article : Is this another example of being "too draconian", ref. item 2 above? Is this really the best you can do? I fail to see how this will aid my digestion this lunchtime, so I'll give it a miss, thanks.

Today's show 15/08/11

Oh God...

You're back.

What on earth have your poor listeners done so wrong that they deserve to be inflicted with five days of your inane ramblings, eh?

And who is it who decides who should stand in for Jeremy when he is away? They need sacking for their inept poor choice.

Needless to say, I won't be listening. Not only because I cannot stand your broadcasting style, but because you have yet again failed to cover anything of interest to me. Allow me to explain...

1) DAVID STARKEY - The historian David Starkey has sparked controversy by claiming ''the whites have become black'' during a discussion on the riots : No surprise that you are discussing this topic, even though it is now three days old. I read an interesting article by James Delingpole yesterday (http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/jamesdelingpole/100100911/if-david-starkey-is-racist-then-so-is-everybody/) in which he makes some interesting comments and revelations. He starts his article like this (my emphasis):

Driving back from my holiday in Wales, yesterday, I realised what a lucky escape I’d had. As I exited the hills and finally got my mobile phone reception back, there was an old message from Friday inviting me to appear on that evening’s Newsnight to talk about the riots. So it could have been me that fell into the BBC’s “raaaacist” trap instead of poor old David Starkey. And make no mistake it was a trap. Starkey’s debating opponent was Owen Jones, the BBC’s new pet angry young socialist whose default position is perpetual umbrage and righteous rage on behalf of the poor, working class, oppressed and – since Friday, apparently – black people. It’s a cheap trick but one that goes down very well at the BBC, which is why they have Jones back so often.

And he ends it like this:

To pillory a man for pointing out such a glaringly obvious cultural fact just because he’s white and Right-wing would have been quite wrong even before the riots. Post riots it is positively obscene. Not just obscene, in fact, but dangerous. Of course, we expect the BBC not to get it. Like the Guardian – and the Labour party – the BBC created the culture that led to these riots, so it’s hardly surprising if it carries on playing the old PC game like the 80s and 90s never went away.

In between he makes some interesting comments, to which I may or may not subscribe, but it is the BBC's handling of this that interests me the most, and in particular the allegation of a trap. Having watched the interview I concur with his view of the BBC's treatment of Starkey, and it comes as no surprise to me that you are continuing to fan the dying embers of this one. Next...

2) UNEXPLODED SECOND WORLD WAR BOMBS - Has an unexploded bomb from the Second World War ever been unearthed in your neighbourhood? : Having just done a little research, I am pleased to tell you that North Wales survived virtually unscathed from WW2 bombing attacks. This means that the answer to your question is "No". Who comes up with this stuff? Hardly "target audience" material, is it? Next...

3) COUNCIL HOUSE EVICTIONS FOR RIOTERS - Should rioters be evicted from council houses? : Oooohhh, a vote. I shall text my answer (presumably "Yes" or "No") to 88291 immediately. Is the result binding on local authorities? Will your discussion change ANYTHING at all? Is it just a waste of time? Would I lose the will to live? Next...

4) GAMBLING TAX ON SEAFRONT ARCADES - And amusement arcades warn that they could go out of business as the result of a new tax. Find out more in this Southend Standard article : The Southend Standard ... a beating heart on the Essex coast, but it must have a miniscule circulation as I cannot find any figures for it at all. We had a story from the Harwich & Manningtree Standard last week, and now this one. Has one of your team moved to rural Essex? Interesting that you have made this specific to "seafront arcades" when, in fact, the new tax applies to all arcades regardless of their location, but then this programme is not usually troubled by facts so why should today be any different? I've never been to Southend but I do live only a few miles from the sea. I am not aware of any of the seaside towns around here having arcades anywhere near the seafront, so how can this story possibly have any relevance to me? Oh, and I've never met a poor arcade owner. Have you?

Now, get off my radio!

Today's show 11/08/11

Another day, another set of stories irrelevant to me. When will you discuss an issue that affects me, rather than the issues that YOU THINK affect me? You only have to ask and I will willingly tell you what they are, but they are certainly not any of these...

1) RIOTS SENTENCING - What is the right punishment for a rioter or a looter? : Oooohhh, a vote. I'll go for walking the plank, and I shall text my vote to 88291. From what I have heard on the BBC news (so it must be true ... I think) justice appears to be rapidly taking its course. I would expect nothing more than your callers to advocate all forms of punishment ranging from death by chocolate through to Monty Python's comfy chair. One thing I do know is that whatever you decide today will not make the blindest bit of difference to what actually happens in The Real World where I live, as usual. Next...

2) MISLEADING LABELLING - Have you been seduced by a 'buy-one-get-one-free' deal and regretted it? : No. I've just listened to your trail on Zoe's show, and I still don't understand what you are planning to discuss, and to be honest I cannot be bothered enough to listen and satisfy my non-existent curiosity. Next...

3) SICK BRITAIN? - Are the riots evidence of sick Britain or is this idea unpatriotic? Find out more in this Telegraph article : Can I just remind you that the recent riots have only occurred in England? Yes, England. Not Scotland, or Northern Ireland, or here in Wales. As for a sick Britain, it has been like that for a long, long time. The BBC and some other sections of The Meedja would not have it any other way. Next...

4) BUS ROUTES SCRAPPED - If your bus service has been axed as a result of spending cuts, what are the alternatives? We offer some help to a stranded passenger. Find out more in this Telegraph article : The third paragraph reads: The MPs said that 70 per cent of councils have cut funding for bus services, with rural areas hit worst. I live in a very rural area, so I have just checked to see what the situation is around here. In 2009 cuts were proposed cut to a summer park-and-ride service for walkers in deepest Snowdonia, but more money was found and the service lives on to this day. Other than that I cannot find details of any cuts to bus services in Gwynedd. Perhaps we are just lucky here in this lovely corner of Wales, and this makes this item irrelevant to me.

Perhaps you can do better tomorrow. Or perhaps not. I guess it depends on whether you WANT to do better.

Have you booked Clarkson to stand in next week yet? Or are your listeners still going to have to suffer Ms Feltz?

Today's show 05/08/11

Bloomin' heck ... your web page was updated today before 11am. You see, it really isn't difficult, is it?

There are a few things that I need to mention before we look at your programme today, which - I have to say - looks pretty dire. But never mind, there is always 6 Music.

First is Twitter. I found out last night that if I look at your feed while I am not logged in to Twitter then I can see a lot more (i.e. whole conversations) than if I am logged in. So, I will now only login when I want to leave a comment, and then logout again. Sorted!

Second is Steve Wright. The Daily Mirror did a bit of hatchet job on him yesterday (http://www.mirror.co.uk/celebs/news/2011/08/04/steve-wright-the-enigma-inside-the-weird-lonely-world-of-radio-2-legend-115875-23317894/) which was then followed today by another article in the BBC's favourite paper The Guardian (http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/lostinshowbiz/2011/aug/04/steve-wright-tabloid-feeding-frenzy). Under the faux subtitle "Why is the Daily Mirror so unhealthily obsessed by the mundane details of Radio 2 DJ Steve Wright's diet and 'bizarre' life?" all this article does is re-print the Mirror article virtually verbatim. You mentioned the Mirror article on Twitter yesterday ("By the way, story about my pal Steve Wright in today's #Mirror is hatchet job on a very kind & considerate colleague, who is a radio ledge!") yet, and oddly, you make no mention of The Guardian's article today. I know that the bond between BBC and Guardian is strong, but didn't realise that meant you could not criticise them. Double standards Jeremy, double standards!

Third is e-petitions. I took a look earlier at how the capital punishment petitions were doing. They are loads of them, and both "for" and "against", and with none of them showing anywhere near the required 100,000 signatures. However, there were some other interesting ones that caught my eye:
 - Add "None of the above" to election ballot papers

(http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/620)

 - Reject wrongly spelled e-petitions (although I think that should be "wrongly spelt"..!)

(http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/3519)
 - Don't listen to idiots signing e-petitions

(http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/2843)
 - Don't waste parliamentary time debating e-petitions

(http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/1776)
 - Free the man who pied Murdoch (even though he was only jailed for 6 weeks and the e-petition runs for a year ... some people just don't get it, do they?)

(http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/940)
And my absolute favourite:
 - BBC bias (I signed this one!)

(http://epetitions.direct.gov.uk/petitions/265) 

OK... on to today's programme, which won't take long...

1) WORLD FINANCES - Fear stalks the world's stock markets because of Europe's debt and a weak US economy. Is it time to get all the bad news out now and allow countries to default -rather than apply the sticking plaster of more bailouts and risk worse later? : Should I text my answer to 88291? Next...

2) MOBILITY SCOOTER - We speak to the pensioner who escaped being "barbecued alive" as his mobility scooter burst into flames. Find out more in this Daily Mail article : Another Daily Mail story ... they've done you proud this week. The most interesting sentence to me is "The drama unfolded as the great-grandfather was heading to the weekly car boot in town on Sunday, July 24.". July 24th ... that was nearly two weeks ago. Does this still qualify as news? Has anybody told you that The Titanic sank? Next...

3) STUDENT FINANCE - After 1, a student finance special with money saving expert Martin Lewis : Martin is a star, but I am not a student. Next...

4) ALLOTMENT - And we catch up with Terry Walton on the programme allotment : Ah yes, more sound effects to fill the airwaves. Deep, deep joy.

 

You see, I told you it wouldn't take long!

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - first with last month's news

Today's show 01/08/11

Another week, and more lunchtime tedium looms, apparently...

1) SYRIA - Should we intervene in Syria following reports of a massacre in the city of Hama?: Oooohhhh, a vote. I've just texted my vote to 88291, is that right? I expect that David Cameron, William Hague et al will be hanging on your every word. Or not. Can I guess what your discussion will actually achieve today? How about A Big Fat Nothing, as usual? Next...

I know what the next three items are as I listened to your trail on Zoe's show but, and no suprises here, your web page hasn't been updated yet (11:50). I also notice that all four items appear on your Twitter feed. So who is more important to you: Your Twitter followers (my account JVineBlogMan is still blocked, by the way), or plain common-or-garden users of the old-fashioned internet? While you think about that, I'll go away and come back later...

<Goes away for 10 minutes>

12:00, you've done your introduction and the news is being read, and still no web page update. Oh, like magic, as I type this there it is...

2) DECENCY - Are you offended by adverts on bus stops and billboards featuring scantily clad women? Find out more in this Daily Mail article : Should I be surprised that this comes from the Daily Mail? No, I didn't think so either. Well, if we had a bus stop that displayed such material then I would be able to give you my honest and frank opinion, but we do not have such a bus stop. All of the ones around here are just a pole in the pavement, maybe with the most basic of shelters. Similarly, I cannot honestly think of ANY advertising billboard within 30 miles of here, and if there is it has obviously had so little effect on me as to be instantly forgettable. I think that means my answer to your question has to be "No". It is interesting that you described this item on Twitter in a much more sensationalist and imflammatory way: "Two Moslems convicted for spraying burkhas over bikini-clad billbard models - which is more oppressive, the burkha or bikini?" and asked "Are they spraying the paint for you and for me?". For you maybe, but not for me, thanks. Next...

3) NIGHT TERRORS - Do you - or your child - suffer from night terrors? : What child is that then? You described this as when "dreams become reality". Sounds horrible, and fortunately I have never had that happen to me. The scariest dream I have had recently was when I stayed on a London Underground Northern Line train at Morden (the southern end of the line) and I ended up in Sorrento, Italy and was told that my One-Day Zone 1 Travel Card was not valid for the return journey. That is as bad as it gets for me, so I'm not sure that I could learn anything from Dr Jarvis today. Perhaps one day I'll dream that your programme might (a) discuss something of interest to me, and (b) actually make a difference rather than just broadcasting waffle. Now that would be scary! Next...

4) SMOKING AFTER THROAT CANCER - Have you refused to give up smoking after suffering lung or throat cancer? Find out more in this article from The Sun : Good to see that the Murdoch Empire is being welcomed back in to the ever-hungry news bosom of the BBC. After all, why would you want to find your own stories when your main rival can do it for you? Again, you described this item differently on Twitter: "Michael Douglas has throat cancer surgery - but has now been photographed apparently smoking again. Incredible?". Looking at the photos on The Sun's news page (http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/showbiz/bizarre/3725044/Michael-Douglas-sneaks-a-cigarette-while-on-holiday.html), I cannot see a cigarette. In the top picture I see Mr Douglas holding his hand to his mouth with his fingers folded in such a way that he has formed a hole through which we can see the white background of the boat's superstructure. He looks to be biting his fingernails. In the bottom picture he appears to be examining his fingernails. Thanks for telling me what to think - again - but it raises this question in my mind: Who should I believe? Should I believe what journalist scum from The Sun tell me is the truth? Should I believe you? (As if that is ever going to happen!) Or should I believe my own eyes? I think you can probably guess the answer to that one. Not that I could care less what Mr Douglas does, of course. Going back to your question. I've never smoked any tobacco product, I've never had lung cancer and I've never had throat cancer. I guess that makes the answer "No". Oh well, you tried, and I guess that is the best that I can hope you will do.

I see your bruvver journalists are on strike again today. I doubt that I'll notice any difference, but why don't you support them?

Today's show 29/07/11

If I may, I'd like to go back to yesterday's item about mismatched bed times. Valued blog contributor Stonyground  posted this comment yesterday evening, and with which I can only agree:
"The synchronised bedtime study came up as a factoid on the Steve Wright show a couple of weeks ago. He passed it around his little posse and it was universally agreed to be bollocks. After 17years of successful marriage involving assynchronous bedtimes, I have to agree. Wrighty's discussion took up about thirty seconds rather than thirty minutes, maybe there is a lesson to be drawn from that?".

1) PHONE HACKING AMNESTY - As we learn that the mother of murder victim Sarah Payne may have had her phone hacked, we ask if it's time for a hacking amnesty: no prosecutions in return for the truth : A vote - we've not had one of those for ages. Trust you to come up with this. A real case of one rule for one (journalists), and another rule for everybody else. Here's an alternative suggestion: Tell them that there is an amnesty, get their evidence, and then cancel the amnesty. This would give the journalists the same amount of respect that they give to their victims and readers. What could possibly go wrong? My answer to your question is, of course, a resounding "No". Punish them, punish them all, punish them hard. Lethal injection should do nicely, or hanging. Will I miss them? Not one bit. Scum, the lot of them. And I bet you don't mention Trinity Mirror or Piers Morgan. Who needs the full story, eh? Next...

2) FORCED OUT OF THE THEATRE - The father of an autistic child says they had to leave a musical after staff complained about the boy making noises : "Find out more at BBC News online" it says, so I did. The first piece of relevant information is "who they claim was asked to leave a theatre because he was making too much noise". Hmmm... you use the word "forced", but the parents concerned used "asked to leave". Not exactly the same thing, is it? The second piece of relevance is this "A spokesman for the Ambassador Theatre Group said: "We take our customers' welfare very seriously and are currently looking into what happened. Until that process has been completed it would be inappropriate to make any further comment.". Sounds fair enough to me, but it doesn't make good sensationalist radio, does it? And I don't need to hear it, thank you. Next...

3) BED & BREAKFASTS - And after 1 in Your Money and Your Life, how to set up a bed and breakfast - what every prospective owner should know : Hang on, I need to make a quick phone call..... <makes phone call to wife at work> OK, back now. I've just checked and, apparently, we have no plans to set up a bed and breakfast establishment. Just out of curiousity, what percentage of your audience do you think will be interested in this item? Four decimal places should suffice. Next...

12:10 and no sign of a fourth story on your web page ... I'll come back in a bit.

<Goes away for 10 minutes>

Still nothing. I've got better things to do than sit here waiting for somebody to do their job, so Twitter to the rescue! From your feed:

4) NORWAY - Norwegian singer Anita Skorgan (album: 'Adventus') sings live from Oslo after Norway's awful week : Thanks, but I'll be listening to Stuart Maconie by then.

Have a great weekend. I'll be back on Monday for the weekly scraping of the news barrel.


UPDATE:

Rather than just continuing with your blatantly biased bashing of Murdoch, why don't you switch your viewpoint to cover the atrocities occuring in your own particular Ivory Tower? Try these two for starters:
http://www.guardian.co.uk/football/2011/jul/26/ally-mccoist-rangers-bbc-apology

http://newsnetscotland.com/index.php/scottish-opinion/2844-mccoist-apology-what-does-this-tell-us-about-the-bbc.html

 

Go on, I dare you, and I'd listen to that.

The BBC is the biggest and blackest Pot when compared to Murdoch's kettle.

Bias - alive and well at the Biased Broadcasting Corporation.

Today's show 17/05/11

Tuesday, and let's see what delights you have in store for your listeners today:

1) THE QUEEN'S FIRST VISIT TO THE REPUBLIC OF IRELAND - The Queen starts an historic visit to Ireland today. Should she apologise for what some Irish Republicans still regard as seven hundred years of oppression by the English crown? : Oooohhh... a vote. Somewhere somebody is sweating over a keyboard as they write the Queen's "Hello, I'm here" speech...

Script Writer 1: Which one are you doing, the one with the apology, or the one without?

Script Writer 2: Oh, I don't know. Which would you prefer to do?

SW1: Well, we don't know yet if we have got to include the apology.

SW2: Hmmm... so the one without will need a bit of padding to fill the time.

SW1: You're right there.

SW2: OK... I'll do the one without the apology as I'm good at waffle.

SW1: Doh! I'll do the apology then. I'll put Radio 2 on so I can listen to Jeremy Vine.

SW2: How do you know he is talking about this today? His web page is never updated until 11:30 - at the earliest.

SW1: You're wrong there, updated by 10:45 today, and yes, he is. He will give me some idea of what to write.

SW2: Does he also get to decide which speech Her Maj will use?

SW1: Of course!

SW2: One of us is wasting our time today....

2) OVERSEAS AID PLEDGE CHALLENGED - In a letter that's been leaked to The Times, the Defence Secretary Liam Fox tells David Cameron that the government shouldn't enshrine in law a target to spend 0.7% of our national income on foreign aid : Mr Fox is entitled to his opinion, and to express it to the Prime Minister. Somehow I don't think that either of them will be listening to your programme today, so your discussion today will not change anything. Next...

3) HAS YOUR TEENAGER EVER DISCOVERED YOUR PORNOGRAPHY? - At one o'clock, has your teenage child discovered pornography in your bedroom and if so, did it have a detrimental effect? : Mmmm... lunchtime porn. And the point of this is what, exactly? We don't have a teenage child, so this is of no relevance to me. Next...

4) SURROGATE MOTHER OF SIX CHILDREN - And finally, we talk to a woman who's been a surrogate mother six times. She's pregnant again. Why does she do it? : I have no idea, or interest, but in a similar vein how about these suggestions:

 - And finally, we talk to a man who runs a radio phone-in about so-called news topics that are anything but news. He's on again today. Why does he do it?

Or

 - And finally, we talk to a man who emails a radio programme every day just to tell them why he won't be listening. He's done it again today. Why does he do it?

Perhaps the answer in all three cases is "Because I can".

Huey Morgan is sitting in for Lauren Laverne on 6 Music this week but I'm not a great fan of the music that he plays, so it will be CDs from 12 until 1pm.

UPDATE: Rent-a-Mouth George Galloway was used to fill air time in the first item today. I have no doubt his pearls of wisdom were as unique as ever.

Today's show 04/05/11

I didn't listen yesterday (as if...!) but hope that during your discussion on Bin Laden's demise that you mentioned possible BBC involvement with Al Qaeda. More details can be found in the Daily Telegraph's story (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/wikileaks/8472430/WikiLeaks-leaked-files-accuse-BBC-of-being-part-of-a-possible-propaganda-media-network.html) but it is the comments by Andrew Marr (remember him?) in the final paragraphs that interest me the most. Marr said, apparently, that "The BBC is not impartial or neutral. It’s a publicly funded, urban organisation with an abnormally large number of young people, ethnic minorities and gay people. It has a liberal bias not so much a party-political bias. It is better expressed as a cultural liberal bias.” while the BBC spokesperson said ""Independence and impartiality are at the heart of all BBC World Service output.".

I take the view that if the BBC is going to lose its impartiality (if it has not already gone) then I am paying my Licence Fee (a tax!) to support a broadcaster of propaganda. I'm really not happy about that, and so perhaps it is time once again to research what actually happens if somebody doesn't buy a licence.

Moving on then to today's mind infiltration...

1) VOTING REFERENDUM - Tomorrow, there's a referendum on whether to change the voting system, from first past the post to AV. Armano Ianucci tells us why he's voting for change. Peter Stringfellow says he's sticking with first past the post : Thanks, but I don't need to be told how to vote by a comedian and a nightclub owner. What makes them so special that I should hang on their pearls of wisdom, eh? My wife and I have both made our decisions on which way to vote, and our views do not coincide, so together we will have absolutely no effect on the result. Now there is democracy in action! We had a referendum in Wales a couple of months ago, but it must have been something trivial as the national BBC news gave it hardly any mention. Next...

2) IAN TOMLINSON - The inquest into the death of Ian Tomlinson delivered a verdict of unlawful killing. Should the police officer concerned now be prosecuted? : Is this a vote? I'll vote "Yes", but it won't change anything, will it? Here is a video of the Metropolitan Police doing their job: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4dSsptuOiHE. Oh how happy I am that I don't live in London. The video was made by the "Love Police" aka Charlie Veitch. Charlie was recently arrested (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-cambridgeshire-13237702) on suspicion of "conspiracy to cause a public nuisance". To me that says he was arrested for thinking about maybe doing something that the Metropolitan Police would not like. It is interesting that you can now be arrested BEFORE you commit a crime. Search on YouTube for more Love Police videos, they are fascinating - and worrying. Next...

3) OSAMA BIN LADEN - As the White House changes it's version of how Bin Laden was killed, there have been fresh calls to show a photo of the body. Others say it would be too gruesome : Let's see the photos, and I refer you to my comments above. Next...

4) THE FESTIVAL OF BRITAIN - Finally, do you remember the Festival of Britain? Sixty years ago, the country celebrated all that was wonderful about Britain. What are your memories? : It was seven years before I was born. For any person to have any memories of the event they would have needed to be at least in their late teens or early twenties in 1951, so that puts them in their 70s or 80s now. Is this age group part of your target audience demographic now? No wonder your programme fails to appeal to me. Oh, and this is not news.

6 Music beckons...

UPDATE: I've just found out the the Festival of Britain piece was just a plug for a programme on Radio 2 this evening.

Today's show 31/03/11

You will be aware of the old saying: There is no smoke without fire.

 

This time it is the Daily Telegraph fanning the flames and accusing the BBC of bias:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/8416166/BBC-criticised-for-bias-over-Zadie-Smiths-R4-broadcast.html

http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/edwest/100081864/has-the-bbc-given-up-all-pretence-of-political-impartiality/

Are they wrong, or is the Dead Tree Press just ganging up on the BBC? I think your listeners should be told!

 

The one news organisation that doesn't seem to be covering this story is the BBC. Funny that....

With only two JV shows to go before I switch to 6 Music, let's look at today's trivia...

 

1) ARE WE PUTTING TOO MUCH SALT ON OUR CHIPS? - Stockport council have a campaign where chip shops hide the salt because we're putting too much on our chips : Stockport ... that'll be in an English nanny state, and the story comes from the Daily Mail. Need I say more? Next...

 

2) SHOULD WE BE OFFERING EXILE TO COLONEL GADDAFI? - Following the defection of the Libyan foreign minister, should we positively be offering exile to Colonel Gaddafi himself? : Oooohhh, a vote. I am sure that William Hague will be hanging on your every word and awaiting the result with interest, and ready to pick up the phone at 1pm to call Gaddafi and tell him what has been decided. Or perhaps not. Next...

3) TROUBLESOME TEENAGERS - Why are parents so bad a parenting teenagers? : I have no experience of this, so it is of no interest to me. Next...

4) WHY ARE PEOPLE ANNOYED BY DOOR-TO-DOOR SALES PEOPLE? - And finally, ex-prisoners and people with learning difficulties are selling dusters door-to-door in order to turn their lives around. Why is this annoying people? : That doesn't happen around here, and this is not news.

 

Let me remind you of what you web page says: Jeremy Vine and guests discuss the news headlines and talk to the people making them

I so wish that the Trades Description Act applied to radio programmes as, today, we have only one real news story (Gaddafi, and even that is falling in to conjecture) and I'm pretty sure you won't be having Koussa or Gaddafi on the phone, so could you tell me which newsmakers are you talking to today? Hmmm... that'll be none of them then.

Today's show 18/03/11

Dear Jeremy,

Well, what a 24 hours that was! Following your discussion of a non-existent YouTube video my blog went ballistic as your listeners searched the internet for the video. Searching for phrases such as "jeremy vine bully video" produced some results, with my blog shown somewhere in the first five. My daily readership jumped from 20 to over 200 because of that. A graph from my blog provider is attached.

I would like to take this opportunity to welcome my new readers, and I hope that you will find something of interest and/or amusement in my rantings. Details of who I am and why I write my blog may be found in the very first posting, entitled "Please allow me to introduce myself...", and which can be found here: http://lunchtimeloather.blogspot.com/2010/12/please-allow-me-to-introduce-myself.html

OK, on to today's pointlessness...

1) LIBYA: NO FLY ZONE - The UN has agreed to a Libyan no-fly zone. Do you back the decision? : Oooohhhh... another vote. Mr Ban Ki-moon will, I am sure, be listening today and awaiting your verdict. I will expect nothing less than to see a squadron of jets from RAF Valley pass over my home sometime shortly after 12:30 today as they make their way to Libya if "Yes" wins the day. Next...

2) SUPPORT FOR JAPAN - We ask for your messages of support for Japan : My message: Good luck, you are doing a great job, and don't speak to, read or listen to the UK media, especially the BBC.

But how do we know they will be listening to these messages, or is it all a waste of your time, and mine?

"I haven't seen anybody shouting or getting angry there ..." - unlike your show then.

A neighbour's son is working in Japan as a translater for the emergency services brought in to Japan to assist with the clear-up operations. He told his mother (my neighbour) yesterday not to pay any attention to the UK media as their reporting has been blown out of all proportion and bears no relation to what is actually happening. So, who should I believe? Him, or you? Next...

3) CCTV OUTSIDE YOUR HOME - Have you installed CCTV cameras outside your home? : No, and I believe that if I did they would contravene local planning regulations. Next...

4) SUPERMOON - A so called "supermoon" will be visible tomorrow night. Does a full moon actually affect people's behaviour? : Hmmm... it makes me howl a bit, but I'd like to keep that private. Is there no more news today? Is this really the best you can do? This story comes from the Metro, which is published by Associated Newspapers Ltd who also publish the good-old Daily Mail. How predictable.

This weekend I would like you to think about what you have achieved this week. It shouldn't take long.

Today's show 14/03/11

Good to see that whoever updates your web site managed to get to work today, unlike Friday...

1) Japan Nuclear Plant Explosion - After a second explosion in the Fukushima nuclear plant, is this the evidence the world's been waiting for that nuclear power is not safe? : I remember with great fondness your attempt to hold a meanigful discussion on thefts from oil-fired domestic central heating systems on 28th January and your woeful lack of knowledge and research in to how they were installed and worked. Based on that, am I expected to believe that you have actually gained some knowledge on nuclear energy by doing some research, or will you just try and "wing it" again like you did with oil-fired heating systems? Unfortunately your reputation dictates otherwise and I suspect that conjecture, bias and speculation will rule over this discussion. I live within 10 miles of the decommissioned Trawsfynydd Nuclear Power Station and within 50 miles of the still-functioning Wylfa Nuclear Power Station (map here http://news.bbc.co.uk/nol/shared/spl/hi/guides/456900/456932/img/1199875220.gif). Perhaps I should stop sleeping at night. Next...

2) Japan Aid - The Japanese earthquake and tsunami caused terrible devastation, but given Japan is one of the biggest economic powers in the world, should we be giving aid? : Oooohhh... a vote. We haven't had one of these for a while. Please make sure you tell Mr Hague the outcome as I am sure he will be waiting for your decision. Next...

3) Motorway Speed Limit - The government wants to raise the speed limit on motorways to eighty miles per hour. Will that get the country moving or lead to more accidents? : The Daily Mail makes their own special contribution to your programme again! Fantastic. The important word in the DM's headline is "could", not "will". The last pointless discussion on this topic was hosted by the anonymous Paddy O'Connell ONLY TWO WEEKS AGO on 28th February. What has changed since then? Or does this just mean that you really have no idea what happens on your programme when you are away? Next...

4) The Eden Project - How the story of the Eden project in Cornwall can inspire an economic revival in Britain. We talk to it's founder, Tim Smit : I've been there, and they are doing a great job. It's not news though.


UPDATE 1:
The first contributor to the Nuclear Plant Explosion discussion was a reporter from the Daily Mail. The JV Show and the Daily Mail really are a match made in heaven.


UPDATE 2:
A classic quote from JV some 20-odd minutes in to the discussion: "I think perhaps we should speak to an expert on nuclear energy and get the facts..."

Perhaps he is realising just how out of his depth he really is. I knew I could rely on him for misleading information, because that is ALL he has.

But why would he want to change the habit of a lifetime?


Complaint lodged on BBC web site:

The explosion at a nuclear power plant in Japan was discussed on the show today. Some 20+ minutes in to the discussion Mr Vine stated, quote: "I think perhaps we should speak to an expert on nuclear energy and get the facts...".

Instead, Mr Vine chose to speak to a reporter from the Daily Mail newspaper, whose opening line stated that he wasn't at the power station and was only reporting hearsay.

To prevent speculation, misinformation and scare-mongering I would have thought that any discussion on a topic of this kind would need to have the input from such an expert before going to air. I fail to see how anything meaningful or accurate can come from discussing this emotive topic without having all of the facts available to the presenter.

My complaint is that Mr Vine has, again, failed to research a topic adequately before attempting to discuss it on his programme.