30/04/12, 01/05/12 and 02/05/12

I've got some catching up to do, and a convenient break in work-related matters allows me some time to do so, so best get on with it...

Monday produced this load of old rubbish...

1) KHALIL DALE - A British aid worker Khalil Dale is beheaded in Pakistan. He has been described as a gentle man who lived to help others in war zones : Absolutely tragic, but what did your discussion change? Anything? At all? Let me guess... Next...

2) RECESSION - We’re joined by BBC Business editor Robert Peston. We ask “is it possible to talk ourselves into a recession?” : The answer to your question is "Yes" and the BBC will be leading the campaign to do so. You said on Ken's show about Peston: Does he have to have that gleam in his eye as he talks about the recession? The answer to that question is also "Yes", simply because he is paid by and works for the BBC. Like you, it is his job to do so. When the figures were released and the floodgates opened at the BBC as you searched frantically for someone to talk down the economy. I can only guess the jubilation when the BBC found a fellow doom monger by the name of Raymond Moan (yes, really), a building supplies businessman from Northern Ireland. Mr Moan was used on every news broadcast from then on with the BBC ignoring anybody with a different view, as usual. Next...

3) RED KITE - Have you been attacked by a red kite? : I was hit by one in a park when I was a child. I cannot remember the colour for sure, but I think it was blue and yellow. Oh... that kind of kite. No, I've never been attacked by one of those. You said on Ken's show when talking about Pomeranians: I don't know what size of dog that is. Is that not the kind of basic information that you would need to discuss this topic? Were you winging it (pun intended) again Jeremy? And from my knowledge of birds of prey, of which we have many around here, the behaviour and description sound more like a buzzard to me. Next...

4) MISSILES - Residents who live in flats in the East End have been told that they could well have an air-to-air missile on their roof to protect the Olympics : East End of where? Oh, you'll be talking about that there London. There was a classic Jeremy Vine open-mouth-and-insert-foot moment on Ken's show when you said: Surface to air is a bit of a misnomer as they will be on top of a block of flats. How is that a misnomer? It is an entirely accurate description. Was this the second time in one programme when you did not have a clue what you were talking about? Sounds like it to me! And can I have a missile on my roof, please? Target coordinates: W1W 2NY.

On to Tuesday then...

1) FORDS - A man is swept away to his death while attempting to drive through a ford during yesterday’s heavy rain on the Berkshire - Hampshire border. Have you got into trouble while attempting to cross a ford? : No, and I loved the video clip on the BBC news page you linked to which clearly showed a water depth gauge. Radio about stupid people, by stupid people, for stupid people. There is no charge if you want to make that your programme's new slogan. Next...

2) HATE - Astronomer Sir Patrick Moore whose fiancée was killed by a Nazi bomb in World War 2 says it’s still OK to hate the Germans. Find out more in this article from the Daily Mail : The Daily Mail... what better mouthpiece of the sewer press is there to stir up a bit of racial hatred? And what better mouthpiece of sewer radio is there to further promote it than your programme? You said on Ken's show: Amazing how recently the Germans were still bombing London. The last German air raid on London using conventional bombers (not V1 or V2 rockets) was on the 29 January 1944. That'll be 68 years ago. Is that what you count as "recent"? How are they getting on in Mafeking? Next...

3) COMMUNIST MANIFESTO - It’s May Day, International Workers Day. As the Communist Manifesto, the second biggest selling book of all time, is re-published, we ask whether Communism has any relevance in 2012 : It has as much relevance to me as it has always had: None at all. Needless to say, I did not listen but it was obvious from your Twitter feed that somebody called Daniel Frazer was mightily upset with what you were saying. For the benefit of my blog readers I'll repeat what he said here (http://www.twitlonger.com/show/h7usvt, my emphasis):

@theJeremyVine Of all the trash I have heard from the BBC your show today has to be the worst. Railroading Catholicism with Nazism and Capitalism, leaving Communism as the one true haven. No mention of grinding poverty in Socialist states, no mention of forced famines or gulags. No! just standing behind that Nazism had concentration camps so they were the only evil. What is a gulag or Siberian banishment if not a death camp? You are an abhorrent figure, willingly rallying and distorting the truth about the Communist manifesto and Capitalism. By playing Internationale today will you play Die Farne Hoch on the anniversary of the Munich Putsch? The anthem of a lot less brutal regime in Europe at the time? You do indeed fit the billing to partake in the worst waste of public money in all history, with your red brethren at the BBC. It is just that you and your show will end up in the cesspool of history.

He makes some good points! Next...

4) CANNABIS - And finally, Holland starts to close some of its “coffee shops” to tourists. Did you only go to Amsterdam for the cannabis? : I've been to Amsterdam only once and I was only there long enough to change trains, and I've never had anything to do with cannabis.

And finally, on to today...

1) PRESCRIPTIONS - A new report finds 1 in 6 patients are being given inaccurate prescriptions. We talk to someone about the day they spotted a serious error in their prescription : I rarely have prescriptions, and that has never happened to me. However, I do always check to see I have been given the correct stuff before using it. Obviously I am not a member of your Target Audience. Next...

2) RUPERT MURDOCH - Is Rupert Murdoch unfit to run a major international company? We talk to Tom Watson, hot from the MPs' Select Committee report, who says he clearly is : More Murdoch ... YOU LOVE IT! I have no view on Murdoch's competency to run his own business, but I find it interesting that you have Watson on your programme today. A couple of days ago this interesting little tête-à-tête appeared on your Twitter feed:


That all sounds a bit cosy to me. Anyway, it seems Watson might be in trouble (http://order-order.com/2012/05/01/dial-s-for-special-access-watson-revealed-committee-findings-in-book/) as in his book (the one whose "title is best so far this year") he revealed the committee's findings before they were published. I'd bet that you don't ask him about that. Next...

3) MAYORS - 10 towns and cities vote tomorrow on whether they should have mayors. Do you want a mayor for your city? : My nearest city already has one, thanks. Oh, you've missed out the important words "in England". Deliberate misinformation again Jeremy? Next...

4) ROY HODGSON - The new England manager is already being ridiculed for his speech impediment. What makes people think it's ok to ridicule someone with a speech defect? : Who? Oh, this is to do with sport. How boring. It is better to have a speech defect and talk sense than to talk rubbish perfectly, don't you think? You would know.

The Jeremy Vine Show - always ready to talk to (and pay) Labour MPs but please do not call us biased!

19/04/12

Ooohhh... with a convenient gap in today's workload this really is like old times...

Did you hear the R2 news at 08:00 this morning? There were two stories that included either the words "Labour says..." (Qatada deportation) or "Labour wants..." (British Pregnancy Advisory Service hacking). Does "Labour" not have a name any more?

1) ABU QATADA - It’s been said that the deportation of the rebel cleric Abu Qatada is descending in to chaos. Did home secretary Theresa May get the day wrong? : I've not seen the paperwork, so I could not possibly comment, but there is nothing quite like a good old fashioned "it's your fault" finger pointing exercise, is there? You love it! And what will you change? Absolutely nothing, as usual. I suggest you ask "Labour" about this as they seem to know more than Theresa May, apparently. Next... 

2) TWITTER - Have you ever been on Twitter? We debate whether Twitter is good or bad for the human soul : No real news today then? I'm sure I just heard something about more journalist scum being arrested, which you conveniently have ignored again. I only signed-up for Twitter so that I could interact with your programme. You know the one... the programme broadcast by the UK's state broadcaster that I have to pay for by law and that relies on audience interaction for its content. But then, presumably because I disagree with and challenge your views, you have blocked me from following you. Fortunately Twitter's "blocking" mechanism is not quite as good as you obviously think it is and there are ways and means around it. We will, of course, be finding out what the BBC Trust think about this next month and whether they consider that free speech is a right for all, or just a favour granted to those who comply with BBC corporate policy. All views are personal, of course. Next...

3) HOODIES - Would you employ a young, unemployed Brit rather than a “hard working eastern European”? Employment minister Chris Grayling says it’s time to employ a hoodie : I look forward to hearing that you have employed at least one "hoodie" on your show. You know, just to show willing and to reinforce your point. As for me, well I have just enough work to keep me busy, thank you, and I do not need to employ anybody. Next...

4) SEASIDE WALKS - Why a walk by the sea is better than a walk in a park, or even the countryside. Why do so many of us yearn to live by the coast? : I live only a short distance from the sea so, by definition, I cannot yearn to live there as I already do. Disenfranchised again!

And I'd bet money that Barbara Windsor - like Madonna - does not listen to your show, despite the claims of your sycophantic jingles.

The Jeremy Vine Show - challenge our brainwashing and we will block you!

09/04/10 and 10/04/10

Hi Jeremy,

Remember me? I'm back! I bet you're pleased about that. I've had a couple of weeks off while I do some stuff and reassess what I want to do with regard to your programme and my blog. But you need not worry: This festering sore is not going to go away just yet. Instead, I am going to email you (and update my blog) as and when I can rather than trying to do it as your programme starts. Frankly, I have got better things to do than tell you what I think of your programme, and this is not helped by the incompetence and tardiness of whoever it is (who is it?) who is responsible for updating your show web page every day. In my recent second appeal letter to the BBC Trust I have promised to stop filing complaints about how late these updates can be some days, so my best course of action is to stop waiting for them and write this rubbish later in the day and after somebody has done the job that I pay them to do.

All this means, of course, is that I will no longer be telling you "I won't be listening today because..." and future messages will tell you simply what I think of the topics you decided to discuss on previous shows. The advantages to me are:
 - no time constraint
 - the web page will have been updated
 - I can have a good laugh at any relevant bits by using iPlayer

A win-win-win situation, I think!

I wonder what I missed while I was having a break? Well, actually I couldn't care less what I missed to be honest, but I do know that I missed Feltz talking (talking? or fawning?) to Galloway. So that was a result then. I cannot think of two people I would rather never hear ever again.

I bet I didn't miss you discussing this:
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-2126040/BBC-bias-Is-Corporation-representing-British-nation.html

The BBC has a duty to represent the British nation...but is it doing so?

There's an interesting dialogue taking place on the internet.  It can be seen in blogs, chatrooms and on social network sites and it runs something like this: why is the BBC TV news output so selective in what - and who - it chooses to cover? It's fair to say, though, that there exists an angry crowd of people pounding on their keyboards and some of what they have to say about our Great British institution is less than endearing. Just as importantly, I feel, is the fact that dissenting voices have increased in volume and intensity over the past couple of years and show no sign of abating.

Perhaps I should get a job at the Daily Mail? Or perhaps not ... <shudder>

And then there was this one:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/9189380/BBC-accused-of-TV-licence-rip-off.html

BBC accused of TV licence rip-off

The BBC is over-charging millions of people for their licence fees by selling "annual" permits that only last 11 months, it can be disclosed. The corporation has been making up to £25m a year through the little-known loophole, which has been condemned as "unfair" and a "rip off". Any viewer buying a TV licence for the first time is charged £145.50 for a year-long permit. But under current arrangements, the new licence expires 12 months from the first day of the month in which it is purchased. This means that an ‘annual’ licence bought on April 30 2012 will actually run out at midnight on March 31 2013.

The BBC? Ripping off the people who fund it? Who'd have thought such a thing could ever happen. Oh, hang on, silly me.

And then, of course, there is possibly the biggest organised cover-up of criminal behaviour ever seen in the UK:
http://order-order.com/2012/04/10/britains-biggest-establishment-cover-up-conspiracy-thousands-of-crimes-committed-by-over-300-journalists-protected-from-exposure-by-a-judge-and-newspaper-editors/

In the course of the Inquiry Leveson has received prima facie evidence of some thousands of crimes committed by hundreds of journalists. The Operation Motorman files gathered by the Information Commissioner expose a culture of criminality in the day-to-day functioning of the media. The corrupting of police and other offices of the crown was a matter of course not only at the News of the World and other Murdoch titles, it was also the case at the Mail and the Mirror newspaper groups as well. The silence on this issue from these newspapers is because they fear a circular firing squad. Leveson has the evidence required to initiate criminal actions and civil actions by thousands of victims of crimes committed by newspaper journalists. Guido challenged Leveson to his face to publish the evidence, thus allowing the victims of industrial scale illegal invasions of privacy to get justice. Leveson claimed it was difficult nine years on. Guido understands that there have been two applications to Leveson to release the Operation Motorman files. The applications, heard in private, were refused. So in Britain we have a situation where the judge charged with investigating the crimes carried out by the media is covering up their crimes. There is an overwhelming public interest in the victims getting justice.

Go on then, discuss that one day. I dare you. Journalism in this country is facing its biggest crisis with huge swathes of the population simply not believing a word that ANY journalist says, including you. So try and explain why your journalist bretheren should not be shot in front of their families. I'd listen. To put it in simple terms: JOURNALISTS ARE SCUM!

One thing I didn't miss was you saying last Friday, "You can tweet me at @TheJeremyVine and we can discuss these topics out of hours". Really? Can I really discuss this stuff with you? If so, let's give it a go. Oh, and you'll need to unblock my Twitter account first ... won't you.

Let's start the day-by-day analysis by looking at yesterday's programme (Monday 9th April). Working on a Bank Holiday ... I can't remember you doing that before!

1) BOAT RACE DISRUPTION - The protestor who disrupted this year's Boat Race has now been charged. How do we avoid similar incidents at the Olympics or the Jubilee celebrations? : My interest in anything sporty is legend and as close to non-existent as it is possible to be. BUT, had I have been in one of those boats on Saturday I would have made sure that this idiot had got an accidental clout from my oar before the race was stopped. I'm just listening to this on iPlayer and waiting patiently for you to come up with a concrete proposal ... ah, here we go: "If this person had been running in to a Presidential motorcade he would have been shot" and "If he thought we would have been shot for swimming in the water he wouldn't have done it". An interesting suggestion Jeremy, that'll boost the TV ratings. And the security expert you interviewed said "There is no way you are going to prevent it". This was then followed by some inane comments from your inane listeners (shooting with an underwater harpoon, for example). And guess what? Other than shooting the person involved, you failed to come up with any useful suggestion. I bet Teresa May was devastated. OK, enough of iPlayer now. Remind me, what was the point of this discussion again? Next...

2) RAUNCHY MUSIC VIDEOS - Should raunchy music videos get an 18 rating? : What, and deny legions of teenage boys 30 seconds of pleasure? You are such a spoilsport. Next...

3) DOMESTIC SERVICE - Was one of your parents or grandparents in domestic service? : No, they were not. I love questions like that. Next...

4) ANIMAL IN HEADLIGHTS - A driver writes off his Ferrari trying to avoid a hedgehog in the road. Do you swerve when you see an animal in your headlights? Find out more in this article from the Daily Mail : Stop, yes. Swerve, no. We get all sorts of wildlife on the roads around here: hedgehogs, sheep, rabbits, cows, deer, badgers, foxes, owls. I've managed to avoid them all. And good to see the Mail is still providing garbage for your programme, especially when it involves a story from Germany. Was there no UK news then?

OK, that's one day down so perhaps I should do today's show too. I did notice at about 1:30 that the web site hadn't been updated. Some things never change, but that particular failing of the BBC is no longer an issue ... so here we go...

1) EXTRADITION - The European Court of Human Rights rules that five terrorism suspects - including the radical Islamic cleric, Abu Hamza - can be extradited to the US : I hear that Guantanamo Bay is nice at this time of year. An interesting tweet from Stewart Jackson MP appeared on your feed earlier: Went head to head with human rights lawyer @TheJeremyVine show. Out of touch & publicly funded (mostly). Public have human right to be safe. Out of touch and publicly funded? Who WAS he talking about? Next...

2) CHARITY FUNDRAISERS - Volunteer fundraisers in Aldeburgh withdraw their support from the Macmillan cancer charity because they say the organisation hired door-to-door collectors who used high-pressure techniques. Find out more in this article from the Telegraph : Living in a rural area as I do, the number of "cold" door-to-door callers that we suffer per month can probably be counted on one foot of a three-toed sloth. A well-known double-glazing company who tell me I should "fit the best" are regular if infrequent visitors, but even they are starting to understand the meaning of "Go away, and get off my property". I find that works quite nicely. It does not make economic sense for charitable organisations to target this area, and any charity I choose to support would not do such a thing (and I would soon cease to support them if they did). I find it amazing that some people allow themselves to be ambushed in the street and are then conned in to signing a direct debit for a montly payment to a charity not necessarily of their choice. Oh, hang on... I remember you saying to Zoe earlier today that this happened to you. Says it all really. Next...

3) TITANIC - One hundred years ago today the Titanic set sail from Southampton. Do you have a personal connection with someone who was on that fateful voyage? : No. Instead of reading all that "Night To Remember" stuff, get yourself a copy of "Titanic : The Ship That Never Sank" and a copy of the Board Of Trade enquiry in to the sinking. You might learn something. Next...

4) HAIRDRESSERS - Hairdressers are angered by EU proposals to encourage hairdressers to have regular ‘social dialogue’ to encourage ‘mental wellbeing’ in the workplace. Find out more in this article from the Daily Mail : And the Mail again ... bless! Sporting as I do a fine head of skin, my barber (he is not a hairdresser and would be offended by the term if used to describe him) does not take long to do a trim around the edges every couple of months. Our conversation is usually driven by me, and I have often caused a chuckle among other waiting customers when I have asked him "Have you been anywhere nice on holiday then?". Our bi-monthly meetings usually end with a genuinely warm and friendly handshake as I give him £7 and remind him that he has only done half a job while he tells me to get the hell out of his shop, and don't come back until the next time. He is a top bloke, and he does a fine job.

 

So there we go. That was fun! Let's do it again soon.

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - shooting is the only possible solution

Today's show 20/03/12

How did it go yesterday then? Did you manage to improve our world and our lives at all? Or did you just do what Jeremy does and change absolutely nothing?

At about 1:54 yesterday you said, "Morag, stay there" - several times but you never went back to her. Is she still hanging on? Poor woman ... lied to and then cut off in full flow. Nice.

The easy ride ends here, and here are some topics you won't be discussing today (which is a shame, because I would listen if you did):

http://www.guardian.co.uk/media/2012/mar/16/bbc-viewers-comfortable-pay-download-service

BBC viewers 'very comfortable' with pay download service

Viewers are "very comfortable" with the BBC's plans to launch an iTunes-style download service which would open up thousands of hours of never-before repeated content, according to a senior corporation executive. The BBC's director of archive content Roly Keating said he wanted it to be the "norm, not the exception" that BBC shows were available to buy online soon after transmission.

Very comfortable? I don't think so. I pay £145.50 for my licence fee and then have to pay again to watch the programmes I have already paid for. Bargain!

"As Mark Thompson said in his speech, this is not a second licence-fee by stealth or any reduction in the current public service offering from the BBC".

Oh, silly me. Because, errr, Mark, Mark Thompson, ummm, errr, (see 24th January) says that it must be true. You can fool some of the people...

Talking of Thompson...

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/entertainment-arts-17433580

BBC director general Mark Thompson announces departure

The BBC's director general, Mark Thompson, has told staff he will leave the corporation this autumn. With nearly eight years in the job, he has been the BBC's longest-serving director general since the 1970s.

Presumably he wants to spend more time with his enormous pension. We can only hope that his successor has the ability to string a coherent sentence together (again, see 24th January).

And what's this in the video at 00:30...? "Relations with the Tory-led government appear cordial now. The Murdoch empire is the new media bogeyman". Really? Whatever the government do you still have Ed Balls on speed-dial to tell us why it was a bad thing, but it is good to see the BBC finally admit that they're gunning for Murdoch. Many of us have known that for a long, long time.

And finally...
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2117389/TV-licence-cheats-make-TENTH-magistrate-court-cases.html

TV licence cheats make up a TENTH of all magistrate court cases

More than 3,000 people a week are being prosecuted for not having a TV licence making up a tenth of all magistrate court cases, it has been revealed. Spiralling numbers of prosecutions courts deal with more such cases than any other offence. Two out of three of the defendants are women – thought to be because they are more often at home when enforcement officers call.

Well, Thompson's pension will have to be paid for somehow. TV Licensing have no right of access to our homes, and cannot prosecute without evidence. I need say no more.

Ooohh look, a nice early web page update today (11:25). You see, it can be done!

1) SERIAL KILLER - A serial killer who appears to target Jews and Muslims is still on the run in southwest France. We speak to someone who suggests that France should blame herself : And so we have your first mysterious "someone" of the week. Let's just hope that the killer is caught soon, but I fail to see what your discussion today will achieve. Next...

2) RESTORATIVE JUSTICE - If someone in your family was murdered, would you ever be able to forgive the killer? We talk to Tanya Byron about the power of restorative justice : I haven't forgiven other people for far less than murder, so the answer to your question is "No". How is it that Tanya Byron is not just another "somebody"? Next...

3) TAX - The Chancellor says, in the interests of transparency, he will tell us exactly what our taxes are spent on. Critics say that will help the government justify spending cuts : I hope this happens, as I would like to know. Now, if only the BBC would do the same and learn what the word "transparency" means. Next...

4) FABRICE MUAMBA - Why are we being asked to pray for the Bolton footballer Fabrice Muamba - when surely it’s the doctors and nurses who will make him better? Find out more in this article from the Mirror : Are we? A friend and neighbour of mine was seriously injured in an accident at work two weeks ago. We don't know for sure what happened to him, but there is a suspicion that he had a heart attack which then made him fall and caused his subsequent injuries. He died yesterday. My heart goes out to his wife, son, daughter and young grandchild that he has left behind. If I do any praying I think I'll pray for them instead, if you don't mind.

Today's show 12/03/12

Just for a change it is me that is late today. I had to go out on an errand and with no DAB radio in my car I had the opportunity, if that is what it was, of listening to the first 45 minutes of your programme. I was again reminded why I don't listen every day.

 

The last item on the 12:00 news concerned the libel payment given to BBC EastEnders actor Steve McFadden by the News Of The World. No surprise that the perfect storm of a BBC employee and NOTW was mentioned, especially in that context, and no surprise either that your first words after the news were "Remind me, who published the News Of The World?". Any opportunity to have a dig at Murdoch is not to be missed, is it Jeremy?

 

The programme then proceeded in to the first discussion item:

 

1) US SOLDIERS - An American soldier shoots dead 16 Afghans, including 9 children. We talk to someone who asks: why do we ally ourselves to the US when they continually bring shame on themselves, and us as well? : Another "someone", and this time it was Peter Oborne who is the Daily Telegraph's chief political commentator, apparently, or otherwise known as a "journalist". You also spoke to another "someone" and that was ex-RAF navigator and military commentator John Nichol. It was a reasonably interesting discussion, but I cannot honestly say that my life was enriched by it and I was left feeling that one of your guests knew what he was talking about and the other one did not. I'll leave you to work out which was which. The discussion included yet another "let's play the most (in)appropriate song we can" moment when you went straight from this discussion in to Bruce Springsteen's "Wherever this flag's flown we take care of our own". Do you do it deliberately? Next...

We then moved on to this:

 

2) GAY MARRIAGE - The Catholic Church calls on their congregation to oppose gay marriage. But did you attend a civil partnership ceremony and change your mind about gay marriage? : I have never attended a gay marriage, but it will almost certainly happen one day. I'll admit that my patience got the better of me about 10 minutes in and I switched over to Heart FM to satisfy my craving for "entertainment". Next...

3) RAPE - A Mumsnet survey suggest that 80% of rapes and sexual assaults are not reported. Why do so many women not report rape? Find out more in this artcile from the Telegraph : Errr... Next...

4) INTERVIEW QUESTIONS - We talk about the job interview questions designed to catch you out, such as “If you were a dinosaur, which one would you be?” and “Try to sell me your biro.” : In all honesty, I cannot ever see me being involved in another job interview, either as an employee or as an employer.

 

In the 40-odd minutes that I listened you invited three times to "follow me on Twitter" or "message me on Twitter". Thanks for the invitation, but you'll need to unblock me first. And I notice that you have changed your Twitter profile from "All views personal of course" to "All views are my mum's". I must remember to mention that in my letter to the BBC Trust as I am sure they will be interested.

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - making you feel like you need a shower

Today's show 06/03/12

Good morning. Here is the news from the BBC:

http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/4172233/BBC-blows-13m-on-TV-licence-threat-letters.html

BBC blows £13m on TV licence threat letters

THE BBC was blasted last night for spending £13.5MILLION on chasing unpaid licence fees over the past four years. It has sent out a staggering 85million warning letters — dubbed "threatograms". The huge bill, with each reminder now costing 18.3p in postage, was footed by licence fee payers who stump up £145.50 a year to watch telly.

All part of the unique way in which WE fund the BBC, of course.

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/bbc/9124453/BBC-refuses-to-sign-pledge-to-get-more-women-on-screen.html

BBC refuses to sign pledge to get more women on screen

The BBC is the only major broadcaster to refuse to sign a pledge to increase the number of women in heavyweight roles on screen – despite Mark Thompson admitting that the corporation "got it wrong on women" in the past. However, the BBC – which has recently admitted it does not have enough women in serious news and current affairs roles – said it would not sign up because of its duty to represent all licence fee holders. A BBC spokesman said the corporation was "sympathetic to the aims of the Broadcast pledge" but the licence fee means it is unable to endorse campaigns.

I can only take this to mean that the BBC considers that women do not represent licence fee holders, or that women don't need to buy a TV licence. And I can think of many, many campaigns that the BBC has endorsed over the years....!

But hush my mouth! In this particular environment the BBC is absolutely sacrosanct and can do no wrong in any way. Silly me. Instead we have this...

1) BUYING BRITISH - Ed Miliband says it’s time we supported British manufacturing. Would you go out of your way to buy British or are you solely driven by quality and value for money?: It depends what I am buying, but generally my answers would have to be no, and no. Should I call in and tell you that? Miliband has been all over the BBC today promoting this ... almost as if the BBC were endorsing a campaign. Just out of curiousity, what makes you think I would do anything that multi-millionaire Ed Miliband told me to do? He makes me laugh though: http://awkwardedmilibandmoments.tumblr.com/ Next...

2) CHILD PORNOGRAPHY - A dad from Hull accidentally downloaded child pornography. He immediately told the police, but the police had said they need to investigate and he can’t be left alone with his child for many months. Find out more from the Hull Daily Mail : I am assuming this has been reported correctly, but there was no mention by you on Ken's show that you would be talking to the Chief Commissioner of Humberside Police to find out what is going on. From that I can only assume that you won't be helping this chap. Changing nothing, as usual? Come on Jeremy, get to the bottom of this and make a difference for once! Next...

3) CHILD BENEFIT - The government wants to cut child benefit for high rate tax payers who earn over £42,475 a year. Is this fair? : We still have no children, we don't earn over £42,475 a year, we don't get any benefits, and that is not fair. Shall I call in about this one too? Next...

4) BENGHAZI WAR GRAVES - And finally, the war graves in a British cemetery in Benghazi, Libya, were desecrated over the weekend. Does this anger you because your father or grandfather fought in the north African campaign? : My father was in North Africa during the World War Two and he is alive and well, thank you. I see your usual striving for accuracy is meeting its regular standard: If these graves were "desecrated over the weekend" how is it that James Delingpole posted a link to the video last Friday? (http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/jamesdelingpole/100140857/cameron-vindicated-grateful-libyan-people-thank-britain-for-their-liberation-from-gadaffi/) By the way, did you hear that Queen Victoria has died?

The Jeremy Vine Show - our news is anything but new

Today's show 02/03/12

I was following your Twitter feed yesterday during the show (not listening, of course) and you tweeted: Caller in Gairloch, West Highlands, says cost of diesel to drive to Tesco and back is £25. Makes a mockery of their bargains. Can I ask, why do you think that is Tesco's fault? Not all of us have a Tesco Express round the corner! My nearest Sainsburys is 60 miles away, nearest Asda 20 miles away. This is my Real World!

And as we head in to the weekend, let's take a quick look at the stories that you are trying to tempt me with today...

1) WITCHCRAFT - A teenager accused of being a witch is tortured with knives, metal bars and a hammer and chisel before drowning in the bath. His sister and her boyfriend are found guilty of his murder : This is absolutely abhorrent and although newsworthy it really is not the kind of thing I would want to listen to while having my lunch, thank you. I can think of at least two religions whose followers legally mutilate their children in the name of their faith. Perhaps you should discuss that one day? Next...

2) MIDDLE CLASS BENEFIT CHEATS - Forget the stereotypes of unshaven layabouts drinking cans of lager in front of the TV at ten in the morning - are middle class benefit cheats the worst offenders? : I have no idea, and as I receive no benefits of any kind I can only assume that this does not apply to me. The question is though, will you manage to drag any of these people away from This Morning, Loose Women and Jeremy Kyle to listen to your programme? Next...

3) RENT - After 1, when your partner moves in should you charge them rent? : No. As I have said before, I have utmost respect for Martin Lewis but it continues to puzzle me as to why he keeps coming back to your programme. It would not be so bad if you actually listened to and understood what he says, but then why would you treat this particular expert any differently from any others? Next...

4) TODDLERS' EXTRAORDINARY GETAWAYS - A toddler scales a seven foot spiked metal fence to escape from his nursery school. Do you have a story of a child's extraordinary getaway? Find out more in this article from the Daily Record : Not having any children, I cannot give you any stories other than those that involve me in my formative years. Nurseries were a rare thing back in the early 1960s, so I didn't go to one. When I went out with my parents I was kept on a set of reins to stop me from running away. My parents have told me that when I did get away I just kept going. They would call me back and I would just say "Goodbye" and keep going. But things were different back then.

 

Sorry, you have failed again.

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - other radio stations are available

Today's show 01/03/12

I have a quick update on my appeal to the BBC Trust concerning the treatment of my complaints by the "expedited complaints handling procedure", meaning that they are completely ignored. I sent an email to the BBC Trust Editorial unit asking for an update and had a reply by return which said: "We are still considering your appeal, and will write again within the next two weeks to update you.". How odd, don't you think, that my appeal had to be on printed paper (because the BBC said so) and had to be received within 20 days (because the BBC said so) but the BBC can take as long as it likes to respond (because it suits the BBC) and only uses email to communicate with me (because it suits the BBC). Aren't double standards great?

Have you ever heard of Baroness Jenny Tonge? Do you know what happened to her yesterday? It is in several papers today, and was all over the internet yesterday. The BBC chose not report anything until this morning (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-17218291), yet the resignation of James Murdoch was reported minutes after it was announced and was all over the radio news bulletins I heard. Double standards again? I think so and I have no doubt that the BBC would have covered the Tonge story as promptly as they did with Murdoch had she been a Tory peer.

More double standards: You spoke about Joyce's brawl at Westminster last week and you were very keen to distance yourself from too much detail due to the possibility of legal action against him. Yet if I look through the BBC news pages for "Rebekah Brookes", for example, I can find all sorts of stories about her as the BBC seemingly find her guilty until proved innocent for all manner of crimes against humanity, including looking after an old horse (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-17194606) and allegations that it was in a "poor" state on its return (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-london-17200560). That last story in particular wreaks of utter desperation by the BBC to rubbish Brookes and includes yourself if your tweets are anything to go by:
Did today's Sun frontpage send Rebekah Brooks a coded signal that the game is up on the #horse? http://pic.twitter.com/FUyGFShO

Rebekah Brooks horse "has died" - circumstances not suspicious. http://bbc.in/yxulCg

Rebekah's #horse may be the equivalent of the duck island in the MPs' expenses scandal: superficially meaningless, but a devastating symbol
I am no fan of Brookes but is this really a "devastating symbol"? Remind me, what planet do you live on?

There seems to me to be a simple BBC rule in force here: If a person is connected to Murdoch or the Tories then publish what you like, and to hell with them and the consequences.

So let's see if you can include some double standards in today's show...

 

1) TAX CUT - With the budget only weeks away, a number of campaigns want to see different taxes cut. So today we ask: if there was room to cut one tax, what would it be? Cut VAT, cut fuel tax or cut the 50% tax for the rich? : That's easy ... scrap the BBC TV Licence Tax, but that will be out of bounds today - as usual. I'd love to see taxes cut and the introduction of a flat rate income tax that applies to everybody rather than the staggered system we have at the moment. This would be far simpler to administer but we probably won't be seeing that any time soon, and you won't be discussing that today apparently. Unfortunately, and despite me running my own business, I cannot see me being troubled by the 50% tax rate now or in the future. You need to remember that this rate was introduced by Gordon Brown in April 2010, just weeks before the general election (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/consumertips/tax/9114651/50p-tax-rate-is-damaging-economy-and-delaying-recovery-from-recession-warn-500-business-leaders.html) but somehow I suspect you will ignore that and you will allow this to turn in to an attack on the current government. There are, of course, ways around paying 50% tax and your BBC colleagues have done this (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/bbc/9090976/How-Moira-Stuart-makes-sure-tax-doesnt-have-to-be-taxing.html and
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/bbc-helps-its-chief-to-avoid-tax-exclusive-birts-salary-paid-to-his-private-company-1475816.html). Your talking today will, of course, not change anything but as somebody who earns £1million a year, which one would you like to be cut? I think we should be told. Next...

2) HOMS - With the Syrian army continuing its bombardment of civilian areas in Homs, we talk to somebody who says it’s time the West did something to help and someone else who says we should leave well alone : A "somebody" and a "someone". Great. Next...

3) DAVY JONES - The lead singer of the Monkees, Davy Jones, has died. We talk to people who say how much they loved him : Sad, but I was not a fan and I certainly did not love them. As one who grew up during the Monkees heyday my abiding memory is that The Monkees TV series (when first broadcast in the 1960s) was utter shite from start to finish. My sister enjoyed it though ... perhaps it was a girl thing. Next...

4) DAVID RATHBAND - PC David Rathband was blinded by the killer Raoul Moat. Last night he committed suicide. How do people cope after the trauma of sudden blindness? : I have huge sympathy for PC Rathband and can, I think, understand why he chose to take his own life. There is nothing that you or I can do to change that, but I have to remind you that it was only three weeks ago (15th February) that you discussed "SUDDEN SIGHT LOSS - We discuss sudden sight loss and meet a man who went blind overnight". I chose not to listen then, and will do the same today.

Oooohhh... you resisted Murdoch's resignation ... well done!

The Jeremy Vine Show - live from Planet Zaaarrrggg, every day

Today's show 27/02/12

Monday morning again, and let's start in the usual way with a story that you probably won't be covering today, or any other day...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/debate/article-2106177/Now-theres-bonus-deadbeats.html
Now there's a bonus for deadbeats

... The report, by veteran commercial radio executive John Myers, is yet to be published but I’m told it reveals an extraordinary arrangement with regard to BBC staff wages. Apparently, any employee at one of the 40 local radio stations (which employ a total of 3,000 people) who has gone five years without promotion will receive a cheque for £4,600 — which is described as ‘disappointment’ money. So let’s get this right. You are hopeless at your job and are given no incentive by your bosses to improve because you will still automatically pick up a nice bonus cheque.

I've been disappointed by the BBC for years, so where is my cheque?

I think today's items can be dealt with quickly today as not one of them is relevant to me...

1) SYRIA - The wife of a British photographer trapped in Syria says everything should be done to get him out, but what if that risks other lives? : Are you expecting me to have any sympathy for a journalist? Dream on. He knew the risks. But what are you going to do about his situation? Oh yes, absolutely nothing. But you are going to talk about it, which is nice. Meanwhile, innocent civilians are being killed in Syria, yet they are not as newsworthy as a journalist who went there of his own free will - apparently. Next...

2) SCHMALLENBERG VIRUS - The lambing season is already underway in some places, but farms have been hit by the Schmallenberg virus, carried by midges from Germany : As I type this, I can look out of my window and see sheep in the field across the road from my home. The virus sounds horrible, and I can sympathise with the farmers involved. However, I am not a sheep farmer and I have learnt all I need to know from the DEFRA web site (http://www.defra.gov.uk/animal-diseases/a-z/schmallenberg-virus/). Next...

3) SOCIALIST WORKERS PARTY - Has the government’s workfare scheme effectively been taken apart by the Socialist Workers Party? Some say it’s a rotten policy and that’s fair enough, but others say they’ve had too much influence : There is, as you well know, another organisation that has had too much influence on the "workfare" scheme. That organisation is your beloved BBC which seems to be hell-bent on rubbishing workfare at every possible opportunity. This has grown to the extent that an MP is now making a formal complaint (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2106601/Tories-order-police-halt-workfare-demos-MP-makes-formal-protest-BBC-bias-favour-hard-Left-militants.html) about biased BBC workfare reporting. I can only hope that her complaint goes further than the mythical Audience Log where most of mine end up. I remain self-employed and would not qualify to join the workfare scheme. Next...

4) CHIMNEY FIRES - After a spate of chimney fires in Devon — 39 in a week! — we find out why they start and how to prevent them : One of the things that is needed for a chimney fire is a chimney. Can you guess how many we have? Let me give you a clue: It is a round number less than one.

The Jeremy Vine Show - believe us when we say "journalists are special"

UPDATE:

Just noticed on your Twitter feed that the first story has changed and the photographer trapped in Syria is no longer news. I bet his wife will be delighted! Anyway, we now have this drivel instead:

EYESORES - A bungalow with a beautiful view has been put up for sale on the island of Anglesey. The only trouble is – the estate agent’s photo doesn’t show a horrible huge TV mast behind it. However, maybe your lovely house is next to an eyesore but you just don’t care. Find out more in this article from the Telegraph : It isn't, and if there had been an eyesore here I am sure that I would have seen it before purchasing. Meanwhile, I am sure the estate agent will be grateful for the free publicity. And it is LLANDONNA, and not LLANDONA as you put on Twitter.

Today's show 10/02/12

A quick one today...

I had to laugh today as I received an emailed receipt acknowledgement for my appeal letter to the BBC Trust. An email. They insist that all of my communications with them are on printed and posted paper. How quaint. One rule for the BBC, and one for everybody else.

1) EMPLOYING DOMESTIC HELP - Prime Minister David Cameron is interested in an idea which will give you a tax break for employing domestic help : I feel sure that he will give it due consideration, but nothing is changing yet. Nothing changing? No wonder you are discussing it. We have no plans to hire any domestic help. Next...

2) SHYNESS - A psychiatrist manual says that shyness is a mental illness. You may be paralysed by shyness but we talk to someone who says that shy people are just being selfish. Find out more in this article from the Telegraph : Oh good, another "someone". Do you think I'm shy. Do you? Next...

3) QUANTITATIVE EASING - Printing free money or quantitative easing… What is it? How does it work? And is it good for us? : There is £100 and 100 loaves of bread costing £1 each. QE creates another £100. Each loaf now costs £2. There, you can play more music now. Next...

4) ABU QATADA - Finally, we meet the man who spent many an evening with the extremist preacher Abu Qatada. He says he found him friendly, funny and he even told racy jokes : Hang on, you used the "E" word. Did you not get the Andrew Roy's memo? (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/bbc/9067754/BBC-tells-its-staff-dont-call-Qatada-extremist.html). Is "the man" the only one to have ever done this? Is he the same as a "someone"? Perhaps they swapped ideas about what to get from their book club.

I told you it would be quick.

The Jeremy Vine Show - radio's version of quantitative easing

Today's show 07/02/12

A quick one today...

 

How is your Big Freeze going? Here in North Wales it is almost spring-like, with clear blue skys and relatively warm sunshine. We had a bit of a frost last night, but it was all gone within minutes of the sun rising above the mountains. I'm sure your listeners will be interested....!

So, perhaps today will be the day you talk about an issue that affects me...

 

1) ABU QATADA - Most newspapers today are outraged that Abu Qatada has been released on bail. But what exactly has he done wrong and what crimes has he committed in this country? : Newspapers? Outraged? Bless. My heart bleeds for them. Honestly. Like your programme, am I supposed to care about the opinions of the Dead Tree Press and what they try and tell me to think? They fail every day, of course, because I don't subscribe to their claptrap. I have no idea, or interest, in what Mr Qatada has done, but thanks for making me aware of another topic that I can thankfully ignore in the future. This sounds like an opportunity to drag Galloway in to the fray, and that in itself is a good reason not to listen. Next...

2) MEMORY LOSS - A man who was brutally attacked and lost his memory couldn’t even remember his lover. Eventually he learnt to fall in love with her again and they’re now happily married. It’s an extraordinary story : Is it? Oh. "A man" and his family are very lucky to have had such a happy outcome, and I am pleased for them. I was puzzled by your statement on Ken's show when you said it is "biologically impossible to forget your mum". Are you sure about that? I'm not. Next...

3) CHARLES DICKENS - The famous writer was born 200 years ago today. Which passage from Dickens do you know and love? : I last read Charles Dickens as part of English Literature at school. I left school in 1974. I failed my English Literature O-Level exam. Other than the titles of his works (useful for pub quizzes) I cannot remember a single thing. Mark me down as an ignorant, uneducated pleb, if you like. Next...

4) STALKING - Victims are calling for a new stalking law in England and Wales. They already have one in Scotland : This will be a promotion of last night's Panorama programme, which I didn't see. Perhaps you should use your celebrity status (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1311472/Radio-2-presenter-Jeremy-Vine-stalked-months-woman-28-took-name.html) to help these poor victims to get the law changed, but somehow I don't think you will. And that, Jeremy, is a real shame.

 

So, not today then.

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - not changing anything, every day

Today's show 03/02/12

I got the date correct today. I should become a journalist.

Just a quick one due to pressure of work...

The BBC hits the news again...
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/tvandradio/bbc/9055183/BBC-admits-receiving-millions-in-grants-from-EU-and-councils.html

BBC admits receiving millions in grants from EU and councils

The news prompted MPs to raise questions about the BBC’s impartiality when its journalists report on events in the EU.
The BBC admitted in a letter to a Tory MP that it has received nearly £3million in grant money from the European Union over the past four years.

Perhaps this explains why the BBC completely missed the point - and public opinion - when Cameron did his veto thing in December, maybe?

And there was a load of fuss yesterday on the BBC about the head of the Student Loan Company (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-16854187) after he was paid through a private firm, yet this is exactly what the BBC did for John Birt:
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/bbc-helps-its-chief-to-avoid-tax-exclusive-birts-salary-paid-to-his-private-company-1475816.html

BBC helps its chief to avoid tax: Exclusive: Birt's salary paid to his private company

JOHN BIRT, the new Director-General of the BBC, has avoided tax by being paid as a freelance consultant - despite being a full-time employee of the Corporation. Instead of paying tax on his BBC salary, he has been taxed on whatever he chooses to pay himself from his private company.

So, one rule for BBC employees and one rule for everybody else then? Nice one.

On to today's trivia then but your web page (http://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/b01b98y7) has details of the Reverend Alan Sorensen's "Pause For Thought" displayed for some reason, but I can always use the script you so kindly posted on Twitter earlier (http://p.twimg.com/AkuY1rUCEAA-r9a.jpg) instead...

1) PRINCE WILLIAM - The Argentinians say sending William to the Falklands is a "deliberately provacative act" : He works for the RAF and so he does as he is told, and I think it unlikely that you will be able to reverse this decision. Is there any chance, do you think, that our beloved news media is making more of this than they should? Just asking. Next...

2) CHRIS HUHNE - Chris Huhne and his wife will be charged over the speeding offence and the penalty points. He's resigned, but why should he - he's not yet been found guilty? : Did you miss his appearance on TV earlier? He said that he was standing down from his cabinet position so he could devote his time to defending himself. His decision, and accepted by Clegg and Cameron. I'm still waiting for Miliband Minor to pop-up on TV or radio to say "the government are going too far, too fast" which, in Huhne's case, was probably true. And I love this piece by James Delingpole: http://blogs.telegraph.co.uk/news/jamesdelingpole/100134689/huhne-youd-need-a-heart-of-stone-not-to-laugh/. Go on, enlighten me, what is there to discuss? Next...

3) MARTIN LEWIS - Martin Lewis introduces CANCELLATION DAY! Which magazine, insurance, phone, gym, satellite contract are you going to cancel today? : Now, let me think. I get one magazine a month, so I'll keep that. We only have the insurance we need. We have a landline phone which costs little to run thanks to Martin's advice, and my mobile is pay-as-you-go. I do not belong to a gym. And why would I want to cancel my satellite contract when Sky (aka the hated-by-the-BBC Murdoch Empire) provide me with televisual delights every day. I know ... I'll cancel my BBC TV Licence Poll Tax. Martin's advice would be very much appreciated on that one, so please discuss it. Cheers! Next...

 

4) TOP TOTTY - Why did a Labour MP object to a beer called TOP TOTTY being sold in a bar in Parliament? : Sense of humour by-pass, maybe? I am sure that Slater's Brewery will be grateful for the publicity, and good luck to them. Bearing in mind Mr Huhne's situation today, perhaps this brew would be more appropriate...

 

The Jeremy Vine Show - immune from Cancellation Day, whether you like it or not

Today's show 24/01/12

14,000 and counting...

We live in interesting times, and while you were away I had an email from the BBC Complaints Department. It was in response to my complaint that you had spent too much time covering the Costa Concordia capsize, and in it they referred to me as a "viewer" and to your programme as "television output", so the message has to be taken with a certain amount of sceptisim. However, they did tell me: Factors such as how much national interest there is in the subject matter, whether it is news that has just come in and needs immediate coverage, and how unusual the story is will all play a part in deciding the level of coverage in programmes like Jeremy Vine.

So, how about discussing a story today that IS in the National Interest, needs immediate coverage and is unusual? I am, of course, referring to BBC Director General Mark Thompson's appearance at the Leveson Inquiry yesterday. I have found two reports that I can link to (http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-16677720 and http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/leveson-inquiry/9033324/Leveson-Inquiry-BBC-spent-300000-on-private-detectives-says-Mark-Thompson.html). The BBC page includes a short video in which Mr Thompson shows his inability to string a coherent sentence together...
The thinking was, errr, we, we, I, I took the decision to, ummm, with colleagues, erm, erm, and, errr, erm, after discussions with the, with the Chairman of the BBC Trust to, to do a review, ummm, because the BBC is, is the biggest journalastic organisation in this country, ummm, ummm, evidence had come to light, errr, of, ummm, this practice being used by other, ummm, errr, organisations, at least one other organisation, or individuals in that other organisation, and it, it seemed to me that, erm, that as part of the BBC's overall desire to assure the highest possible standards of its journalism it's appropriate to ask the question, errr, errr, errr, errr, is there any evidence, errr, errr, errr, that that, what, what, what we are told, errr, was happening at the News of The World has ever been done at the BBC.

Give that man a pay rise! Don't you love the way he went from "other organisations" to "at least one other organisation" and then to "individuals in that other organisation"? Make your mind up and get your facts right man!

Perhaps the BBC should get a new motto. How about "Nation, errr, shall speak, ummm, errr, peace, errr, unto, ummm, nation"?

While the BBC is under attack from all sides for all sorts of reasons, would you agree that this response hardly instills confidence in us - the TV Licence Poll Tax payers - that Thompson is worth every penny of his £675,000 salary (http://www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/newsbysector/mediatechnologyandtelecoms/8438477/BBC-boss-Mark-Thompson-could-see-pay-cut-Lord-Patten-suggests.html) and the Best Man For The Job is in charge? No. of course you don't.

From the BBC news page:
The inquiry heard that between January 2005 and July 2011, the BBC spent £310,000 on 232 instances when private investigators were used - of which news accounted for 43 occasions, at a cost of £174,500, with the rest for TV programmes.

£310,000 of your listeners' money!?!?! Outrageous! Would you agree that this was, perhaps, a waste of money? No, of course you don't.

He (Thompson) added: "The BBC is not a business and it might well be that someone running a media business might take a different view from the view that I took as director general of the BBC.".

Not a business? Yeah, right.

Thompson said: "The BBC is a public service broadcaster. It is committed to be the most trusted, trustworthy source of news in the world and we want to maintain the highest possible standards in all matters, including matters relating to privacy."

Is this the same BBC that I listen to and watch every day? Or am I living in a parallel universe? The BBC promotes its own agenda and so is not a public service broadcaster. There is a big difference between committing to be the most trusted and actually meeting that commitment. The BBC is now squeezing the last bits of life out of a crumbling reputation earned many years ago. Would you agree with that? No, of course you don't.

Who cares what "the world" thinks? They don't pay for the BBC - we do! Millions of families throughout this land are compelled by law to pay a licence fee so that this buffoon and his cronies can receive millions of pounds a year to brainwash the population into believing their biased propaganda broadcast in the name of "news". Would you agree with that? No, of course you don't.

And what was that about privacy? That will be the same privacy that prevents me - a funder of the BBC - finding out how much your trips to India and Iceland cost, how many complaints were made about your programme, and how many other users you have blocked on Twitter. Pah!

National Interest: Check. Just come in: Check. Needs immediate coverage: Check. Unusual: Check.

And while this is going on, it has been revealed (http://tv-licensing.blogspot.com/2012/01/bbc-confirms-responsibility-for-heinous.html) by the BBC's own FOI Department that the BBC itself authorised the wording used in 3 million letters sent out last year to innocent citizens who happened to live at an address where no TV licence was registered. The wording used was "We want to ensure you have the information you may need before a hearing is set at your local court". Threaten them ... yeah, that'll work. Guilty until proved innocent!

National Interest: Check. Just come in: Check. Needs immediate coverage: Check. Unusual: Check.

So come on Jeremy, they tick all the boxes! It is time to ignore your "BBC Can Do No Wrong" rule and discuss these stories today. I'll listen!

Today's issue that affects me: Why should I renew my TV Licence? No, really, why should I? I wouldn't bother with writing to you every day if I was not paying for this rubbish!

And, as usual, you never fail to disappoint me...

1) DRUG MULES - Drugs smugglers will get lighter sentences if they've been exploited by others. We talk to someone who was jailed for being a drugs mule : Now, let me think ... no, I've never done this. You mentioned that you have "a woman" coming on the show to talk of her exploits. Perhaps she should just have said "No". Next...

2) BENEFITS ROW - A row has blown up over whether families on benefit are declared homeless if two older children have to share a bedroom. We look at the pros and cons of children sharing a room : Now, let me think ... no, I've never done this. And who voted for those Bishops in the House of Lords? And why do they have so much to say about benfits, yet remain strangely silent when something sordid and/or corrupt concerning the Church comes to light? Next...

3) MISSED DIAGNOSIS - A woman says she has been given eighteen months to live after doctors failed to diagnose her cancer on thirteen occasions. Find out more from Mail Online: All hail the Daily Mail! I have been the subject of a misdiagnosis but it was quickly identified and the correct treatment given. I went on to make a full recovery. I think you should use your celebrity status to promote this poor lady's campaign and I look forward to seeing this on her web site (www.helpruthie.co.uk) later. Go on Jeremy, just for once, MAKE A DIFFERENCE! Next...

4) COSTA CONCORDIA SURVIVOR - We speak (TO) Rose Metcalf, one of the British survivors of the Costa Concordia cruise ship disaster in Italy. Watch Rose talking to BBC Breakfast : Yay! The Costa Concordia appears for a FIFTH day. My valued blog reader Will will be pleased after a prediction that you would do five days on this story. With this amount of coverage, do you consider your Target Audience to be likely to partake of a cruise? If so, no wonder I find nothing of interest on your programme.

The Jeremy Vine Show - news, errr, ummm, views, erm, errr, and, and, errrr, live, ummm, guests

Today's show 12/01/12

08:45 : Today's programme @BBCRadio2 in four words: Welfare. Whiplash. Murder? Cough.

11:30 : Still nothing on your show web page. After a flurry of prompt updates to start 2012, is this now going to be the norm?

Today's issue that affects me: Despite the best efforts of our cats and a humane trap, there is no sign of the mouse yet... :-(

Are you discussing anything political today?
How about Ed Miliband's cock-up in PMQs yesterday when he accused Cameron of removing a cap on rail fares, when it was actually a decision made while he was in government? http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-16512206
Or the Sun/YouGov poll issued yesterday evening which showed that 6% of Labour voters and 26% of LibDem voters think that DAVID CAMERON makes a better Prime Minister than Ed Miliband or Nick Clegg? http://cdn.yougov.com/cumulus_uploads/document/1gta5x2v78/YG-Archives-Pol-Sun-results-110112.pdf

Or how about Tesco's announcement of its drop in sales over the Christmas period? Surely Antony Worral Thompson must take some of the blame? http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-16524387

11:45 and somebody has put the first item up, so is there any chance of you discussing something that may interest or affect me today? Let's see...

1) WHIPLASH - If you have a minor car crash, how easy is it to make an insurance claim for whiplash? : You described this on Ken's show as "whooshing". You were not very clear on its definition, and a search in Google does not tell me anything, so I shall remain puzzled, and even more so as you said "I don't know if you can be whooshed if you stop the whooshing". Listening to your chat with Ken, he seems to know far more about this than you do, and I loved his comment "How's your neck? Still brass?". Do you actually hear what he says, or do you just choose to ignore it? I was last involved in a car accident in 2006 and suffered a minor back injury as a result of somebody else's incompetent driving. I did not suffer from whiplash, whiplash was never discussed, and I am not aware that I was "whooshed". Next...

OK... I'll wait now for the remaining items to appear.

11:50, here we go...

2) WELFARE REFORM - The House of Lords has defeated the government’s attempt to reform welfare payments to the disabled : Fortunately, I am not disabled. Unfortunately, I do not qualify for any welfare payments. Next...

3) EDDIE GILFOYLE - Eddie Gilfoyle spent 18 years in prison for murdering his wife. He claims new evidence has come to light that proves he is innocent : I feel sure that you will start a campaign to help this man. Or perhaps not. Crank up the SVG ... number 4 today, I think. In the meantime, have you seen the price of brussel sprouts? Next...

4) COUGHING - Do you have a persistent irritating cough that you just can’t get rid of? : No.

Four out of four again Jeremy, well done!

I shall be in self-inflicted exile over on 6 Music from 12, as usual.

The Jeremy Vine Show - a persistant irritating radio show that you just can't get rid of.

Today's show 10/01/12

Sincere apologies to my readers for the late update today as your staff were slacking again and the web page was not updated until 11:45ish. And this despite your tweet at 08:45 this morning that said: Today's stories @BBCRadio2 in four words: Worrall. Major. Train. Miliband. See you at noon. There is a lack of connectivity here, don't you think?

Anyway, your programme is just starting ... hang on a second ... there, that's better. 6 Music is on now.

So let's look at today's poorly researched discussion topics, all complete with the personal bias for which you are becoming famous...

1) SHOPLIFTING - Antony Worrall Thompson has said he’s sorry for shoplifting but has no idea why he did it. If you were caught shoplifting, what was your excuse? : I have never shoplifted in my life, so I don't need an excuse. Next...

2) HIGH SPEED RAIL - Amidst fierce opposition, the government is giving the go-ahead for the high speed rail link to Birmingham. Are you someone who says ‘I wish I had a high speed train to my town’? : Yes, I am, but being out in "the sticks" it is never going to happen. Your own "anti" viewpoint came shining through during your chat with Ken earlier when you suggested HS2 would only be finished "when we're all dead". Did you think the same about the Channel Tunnel? Did you think the same about HS1 (Channel Tunnel to St Pancras International)? Both were finished long before you and I were dead, so what is your point? HS2 will free up a huge amount of capacity on the already over-stretched London to Birmingham line, a line so busy that it is virtually impossible to run a freight train on it during the day. I am reminded of the huge number of protestors in France who were involved in violent clashes with police during the construction of that country's TGV routes. However, they were not protesting about the route destroying their countryside. They were protesting that the route did not come near enough to their town so that they could make use of it! Your point-of-view will be, of course, that this is all a huge waste of tax payers' money. Well, next time you get in your car remember that all of the roads that you drive on are also funded by us - the tax payers - and whether we use them or not. So what is the difference? I loved your comment on Ken's show when you said "... using what is called a Y-shaped route ..." when referring to the future extensions north to Liverpool, Manchester and elsewhere. I wonder, could that term have been used because it is shaped like a letter Y? Just a guess. You have already made your point of view clear, and knowing that you will dismiss any argument that goes against it and that you will not have researched this topic in any depth at all, I see no need to listen to your ramblings today. Next...

3) LANDMINE DOG - A dog that helped the military defuse countless landmines, and was put down last night, is being mourned. Is it right to use animals in warfare? Find out more from the Telegraph : Oooh, a vote. We've not had one of these for ages. I'm sure that everybody from the MoD to the Taliban will be awaiting the result with interest. Next... 

4) ED MILIBAND - The Labour leader admits that a future Labour government will have a lot less money to spend because of the deficit. Have you got a great new political policy idea that won’t cost any money? : Yes, scrap or privatise the BBC. Easy. What a shame that you are not talking about what Miliband is saying today.

The Jeremy Vine Show - radio for "when we're all dead"

Today's show 06/01/12

A quick one today as I'm busy, so let's do a quick review of the Issues That Affect Me today...

1) NURSES - The Prime Minister wants nurses to spend more time with patients. But are you a nurse who says “I’m a professional. I don’t need a politician to tell me what to do, and I’m not just there to plump up pillows”? : No, I am not. Next...

2) TREES BLOCKING ROADS - An awful lot of trees were blown down by the storms and are blocking roads. We speak to a listener who wants to know if he has the right to chop them up, clear the road and use them as firewood : I am not aware of any fallen trees around here, but my understanding is that the owner of the tree is also the owner of the resulting logs after it has been chopped up, no matter who does the chopping. However, I think you are confusing me with somebody who is (a) interested and/or (b) has a use for firewood. Next...

3) POST-TRAUMATIC STRESS - Lance Sergeant Dan Collins survived being shot twice and two bomb blasts in Afghanistan, but when he returned to Britain he suffered from post-traumatic stress and hanged himself. His girlfriend talks movingly about how he just couldn’t cope : How awful. Here is an opportunity for you to start a campaign to raise awareness of PTSD and help sufferers. Or perhaps not. SVG7 today, I reckon. Next...

4) ARMRESTS - Have you ever sat on a train and had an ungainly struggle over the armrest?: Not that I remember, have you? As I recall, our local trains don't have armrests between the seats. I commuted from Hertfordshire in to London for ten years in the 1970s and 1980s, and it was rare to have an armrest to struggle over even then. Remember this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPUjjhO_DpU But why are you restricting this to trains? The same problem occurs in aircraft too.

There, that didn't take long, did it.

The Jeremy Vine Show - answering the questions that nobody asked